Face Your Truth, Let It Go
by DenyingTheTruth
Summary: "I knew I recognized you," he said, a smile playing on his lips. "And this little act you've got going on won't last much longer. Everyone's going to see you for what you are soon enough. A slut." OC/Punk, Miz, RKO,Nexus,etc. Sexual content/language.
1. Welcome to Paradise

**Disclaimer: It is not a secret that I don't own WWE or any affiliation with it, characters, events, or sponsors mentioned in this story. **

**A/N: I've been away for a LONG time, focusing mainly on my Kelly/Cody story. But, my friends, it is time for me to attempt writing an OC fiction. I really like where this one's going. R/R!**

_I'm sorry for the person I became._

_I'm sorry that it took so long for me to change._

_I'm ready to be sure I never become that way again,_

'_Cause who I am hates who I've been. Who I am hates who I've been._

Vanessa Cherose pulled out her earbuds as her favorite song ended. Relient K always seemed to calm her down, and today, her stomach was in knots.

Today, she was going to prove to everyone what she was. What she could be. What she never would let herself regress to again. Her family had always disapproved, though she considered herself lucky that they never disowned her completely.

She ran a hand through her hair the best she could, hoping it didn't look awful. First impressions, her mother reminded her the day before, are the key in this industry. She began to panic; her unruly dark hair cascaded down her back, quite unkempt from the long flight. She called this her "jungle princess" hair, and unless she spent hours and hours with a straightener, curling iron, and a countertop full of product, this was the best it could really get. It didn't look bad, by any means, but she still longed for the polished, sophisticated look she'd seen so many women pull off. She, on the other hand, looked like she belonged on the beach with her tousled hair and tanned skin.

As her flight landed, she quickly secured a messy bun, hoping it took away from how sloppy she felt. It didn't.

As she nervously exited the plane towards the gates, she scanned the crowd looking for someone holding up a sign with her name on it. She saw dozens of signs, but none looking for Vanessa.

_Fan-fucking-tastic,_ she thought grimly as she pulled her black sweater tighter as the chilly Philadelphia air nipped her. She had no idea who was supposed to be taking her to the arena tonight. In fact, she had no idea about anything. She knew she'd been working hard to get noticed by Vince McMahon, and hoped to high heavens people would start to take her seriously, see her for what she is rather than what she was.

She took a silent vow that if anyone asked her if they've seen her before, she'd lie. Why start off with everyone hating and making assumptions about you?

She walked towards luggage, hoping to at the very least find her stuff. She heard a whistle behind her, and she whipped around, almost dropping her carry-on bag.

"Well, you sure are prettier than what they told me," said a tall, built man who was shielding his eyes with a baseball cap. "Vanessa, is it?"

"Yeah, that's me. What's it to you, asshole?"She said, taking note of the unpleasant tone he'd taken with her immediately.

"No need to get feisty, I'm just here on behalf of the boss. He's a busy guy, y'know," he said, tilting his face up more toward her so she could actually make out his features.

The man took his hands out of his sweatshirt pocket and offered her a hand. "The name's Bryan."

Vanessa shook his hand reluctantly. "Should I…should I know you?"she asked, then immediately felt bad for asking. Of course she should.

Bryan laughed. "It's okay," he said, obviously noticing her bright red cheeks. "Couldn't exactly send Randy Orton or anyone after you, or we'd never make it on time. But, to the WWE Universe, they call me Daniel Bryan."

She apologized profusely, feeling guilty that she'd already made an idiot of herself in front of a WWE Superstar, well-known or not.

"Don't sweat it. Now, let's grab your luggage and get going."

"Why didn't they send a driver for me?" Vanessa found herself asking.

"Well, they were going to. I don't really know what happened from there, and then Stephanie McMahon was running around the back, screeching about how we somehow needed to bring you there. So I volunteered to come get you."

"Well…thanks. Does that mean I'm involved in the scripts tonight?"

"Ah, naturally, they keep you in the dark 'til the last second. Here," he said, tossing a booklet at her that was sitting on his dash. "Better practice now, everyone else has been for a week."

Her stomach dropped. She knew she _could_ be extremely versatile, in any given situation, and make it look flawless. But Monday Night RAW was live, and there wouldn't be any cuts.

"Who the fuck is the Miz?" she asked Bryan, turning toward him.

"Mike. You'll like him. He's an asshole on TV, but I promise you won't mind working with him. I did for awhile, back in my NXT rookie years."

Vanessa let him reminisce, having absolutely no idea what in the hell NXT meant.

_Vanessa Paradise introduced backstage, cut camera from Miz during interview._

"So basically, I let this guy hit on me?" she asked, though it was more of a statement.

Bryan laughed again, checking his blind spot to merge onto the highway.

"I think having you be a valet for Miz is the perfect way to introduce you to the fans. From what I've heard, the creative team is looking to push you two into an on-screen relationship for awhile, and something, I haven't been able to figure out what, is going to rip you guys apart."

"Ugh…a love triangle. Fabulous," she said, tossing the script back on his dash.

"Well, it's about time they do anything fun. It's always about the Nexus and Cena, or Undertaker and Kane. Something light, not so heavy…that's what they need right now."

"And, of course, it just had to be me," Vanessa grumbled.

Bryan pretended not to hear her. "Tell me something about yourself," he urged.

Vanessa thought for a minute. "I don't know that I want anyone to know anything about me," she said finally, realizing that with a simple Google search, people could know the truth.

"Then your time with the company is really going to suck. Let's see…oh, alright, this one's crucial in the locker room. Do you have a guy? Or girl, I guess…?"

Vanessa giggled. "No, I've always been too restless to stay in a long-term relationship. You?"

"Certainly not. But I'm really not looking."

"Good, neither am I."

"Then we can be friends, and that makes my life easier."

"You thought I'd swoon at your feet?" Vanessa tested.

"Of course," he teased. "Most women do."

Vanessa could hear the sarcasm dripping from his words.

"Moving on," he said, "have you ever acted before."

"Mostly in high school," she offered quickly. It wasn't the entire truth, but it worked.

"What about after high school?"

"I studied at the technical college. Got an associate's degree."

"How exactly did Vince find you? You seem like any ordinary person to me."

_Hah. If only you knew._

"A friend of mine sent some stuff I'd been working on in. I'd been trying to get into acting for a long time now," she lied.

"Well, consider yourself extremely lucky, Vanessa," he said, pulling into the arena parking lot.

"I do," she admitted. At least that wasn't a lie, too. She felt bad lying to him, he seemed to be a really nice guy. Those were hard to come by.

He smiled at her as he slid out of the driver's seat and to her side, opening the door like a gentleman.

"Vanessa Paradise, welcome to Paradise," he said, chauffeuring her inside the arena with her luggage over his back.


	2. Encounters

**Disclaimer: It is not a secret that I don't own WWE or any affiliation with it, characters, events, or sponsors mentioned in this story. **

**A/N: I've been away for a LONG time, focusing mainly on my Kelly/Cody story. But, my friends, it is time for me to attempt writing an OC fiction. I really like where this one's going. R/R!**

_There is no way that that's really me,_ Vanessa thought as she stared at herself in the mirror. The stylists really did some work on her hair, she could hardly believe it was the same beachy-frizz she walked into the building with.

"You have no idea how glad I am that this is all natural," the male stylist had said to her, a slight lisp in his voice. "That's so hard to come by. Oh, and the color, it's so beautiful. Never go blonde, baby!" he said, an eccentric tone nearing the end.

Sure, she'd been pampered a little before. But back then, she always did her own hair and makeup. These people were paid to make her flawless.

"Vanessa?" a voice called from outside the Diva's locker room.

"Yeah?" she called back, making her way toward the door.

The doorknob turned, and Stephanie McMahon herself peeked her head into the room. "Thank God, you're all ready to go, you're here, and I don't have to worry about a gunshot wound from my dad," she said, placing a hand on Vanessa's shoulder.

Vanessa offered a smile, feeling extremely intimidated by the woman. Her business suit made her feel completely inferior. Stephanie was the type of person she'd always hoped she'd become.

"All that aside, though, how are you feeling?" Stephanie chirped, as though a thousand pounds of weight had been lifted off her shoulders just by seeing that Vanessa was, in fact, in the building.

"Really, really nervous," she replied.

Stephanie gave her a wide smile. "It's not so bad, I swear. Besides, you've acted before."

Vanessa felt her face get hot. "I…well.."

"Don't worry. It's confidential, we're trying really hard to help you out here. Though I don't think you should be ashamed, Vanessa."

She bit her lip. "I'm not so much ashamed…I guess I just don't want people to judge me because of what I…who I was."

Stephanie nodded. "It's inevitable to have people judge you. But you seem to be a strong woman, you've gotten this far, haven't you? Surely, who you are now is not who you were. Nobody else's opinions should matter."

"Thanks, Stephanie, I really needed to hear that," she said, extending her hand for a businesslike handshake.

Stephanie took it, then instructed her to be in position in half hour.

"I know you can do it. I've seen your work…well, parts of it," she called out as she left.

_Really? When they hired me, did they all sit around and check out my "abilities"? Poor Steph…_

Vanessa quickly changed out of the sweatpants she was wearing and into the denim miniskirt that had been selected for her. She was really, really excited to wear the boots. She wished she could keep the entire outfit, honestly. Unzipping her hoodie, she revealed a black tank top with angel wings studded on the back. A bit of her pink lace bra showed exactly where the stylists had hoped. She quickly pulled on the tall black boots. They were almost past her knees, and she immediately loved them. So much, in fact, she knew exactly what she was going to buy with her first paycheck…

She looked in the mirror once more before headed out. So far, she'd been entirely ignored by the Divas. She hoped they didn't already have preconceived notions about her. But, she had to admit, she looked more real than any of them, with a real tan that came from her Mexican daddy, and dark chestnut hair that came from her mom. She had such a weird combination from her two parents, inheriting the dark, sultry eyes from her father but the cute little nose from her mother. She had to be thankful for that one, since her dad had an exceptionally large nose. People used to tell her that she'd hit the genetic jackpot back in high school, yet people often thought of her as a badass, even then.

She swept a little more liquid eyeliner over her left lid, perfecting it immediately. She liked that her makeup was mostly natural. It wasn't nearly like the way it used to be…

She finally gained enough courage to walk towards the locker room door. She glanced around the hallway, and immediately noticed that everyone was hurrying to do something. Tossing her hair behind her shoulders, she faked confidence as she left. She was about fifteen minutes too early for her segment with the Miz, but finding exactly where she was supposed to be was probably a good idea.

Halfway down the first corridor, she heard a cat-call. She flung around, letting herself glare at whoever the hell had the nerve.

"Don't look so pissed, sexy," a tall, dark-haired man said to her. He spoke on behalf of the entire group of men behind him. "You wouldn't be wearing that if you didn't want to get noticed."

She felt her face get hot with anger. This guy was checking her out up and down. She was used to this attention, but really? She wanted a tiny bit of respect, and that was something that nobody ever seemed to give her…

"I suppose you're right," she confessed, "But I really hoped I wouldn't get noticed by someone like you," she spat, letting the venom spout.

The guys behind the tall guy hooted and hollered, clapping the self-proclaimed leader on the back. "She got you good, man."

"And how exactly would I not notice you? You're skipping down the hallway like a cheap whore," he said angrily.

"Well, it seems to me like you think that 'cheap whores' are 'sexy,' then. That is what you called me, isn't it?"

He grumbled, then turned away to talk to his cronies. One particularly good-looking one glanced back at her. She rolled her eyes, and continued on her way.

Very faintly, but distinctly, she heard that good-looking one say to the leader, "dude, I _know_ I've seen her before."

She hurried further away, so that they didn't get another good look at her and figure it out.

"Way to carry yourself back there," a man said as he poured himself some coffee. "I'm Phil. You just left Wade Barret completely stumped. Good for you."

Vanessa folded her arms across her chest, starting to feel less and less confident. She didn't want people to assume she was a tramp…and maybe that's exactly the image she was portraying after all.

"I can take you towards your segment. It's not too far from here," Phil offered, taking a sip of coffee, then letting it rest against his chest. She immediately noticed his black shirt tight against his muscled chest.

Vanessa couldn't help but to think of what he was hiding underneath his shirt. This guy was more the kind of guy she went for. He seemed to have a dark side, but only as an outside image. That's the kind of guy she always liked to work with. She just never got the opportunity to date any.

"Sure, thanks," she smiled genuinely. For once, she felt a little better about being there.

He began walking the way she had been headed. A familiar voice called out to them only moments later.

" 'Sup, man? And Baby V!" Bryan/Daniel Bryan said, wearing his trunks.

_Where the hell was he hiding all that muscle a few hours ago?_ Vanessa found herself wondering.

"Baby V?" she found herself asking.

"Yeah, I just came up with it," he admitted. "But I like it. So now it's stuck. How's it going, Punk?"

"Good, good. Taking her to where she's supposed to go," he said, nodding towards the cameras.

"Nice of ya. Well, I'm gonna let you get goin', then. See ya, Baby V."

Vanessa waved goodbye.

"So you must be Vanessa after all," Phil said. "I guess I didn't expect you to be so stunning."

Vanessa clicked her tongue. "I've heard that a handful of times already. What's the deal, everyone thought I was hideous?"

Phil laughed. "No, no. Most Divas are pretty, but they require a ton of time to maintain that appearance. You are just so…natural."

"Believe me, this hair took a lot of time to get like this."

"And believe me, even if your hair wasn't all done up, I still think you're the most natural beauty of the girls here."

She didn't know why, but she took an immediate liking to this guy. Unfortunately, though, she knew that even if anything evolved between them in the future, it would be short-lived. In fact, once anyone found out what she was, then things would certainly change. The little pep talk Stephanie gave her earlier began to lose its effect as she wondered how on earth any guy could treat her like a girlfriend once they knew the truth.

"Here we are," Phil said, his hand pointing toward a blonde man with big eyes. He reminded Vanessa of a frog. A cute frog, but a frog nonetheless.

The man offered his hand. "First things first, Vanessa. You should know right off the bat that I'm the Miz…and I'm awesome."


	3. On Air

**Disclaimer: It is not a secret that I don't own WWE or any affiliation with it, characters, events, or sponsors mentioned in this story. **

**A/N: I'm so glad so many people like this! I enjoy reading people's guesses. I thought of this idea literally on a whim, I'm so happy with where it's going. Keep the reviews coming, and I'll keep writing. **

"Alright, Vanessa, you sure you got this?" the Miz guy asked, flashing a toothy grin. "I know you weren't really prepared at all tonight. Just say and do what they want you to. You can't be much worse than Kelly at acting."

She wondered who Kelly was. She felt awful for not knowing anyone at all. She had ideas of who certain people were, she'd met Stephanie and Vince…and had seen John Cena in a couple movies. Truth was, she was completely thrown into this. If it hadn't been for the producers, she never would have even gotten this far. In fact, she'd probably remain unemployed…

"Yeah, I think I'm good," she said, butterflies beginning to go wild in her stomach.

"Cameras rolling in 3, 2…" the cameraman said.

She got into position.

The red light went on, indicating the camera was recording. She tried hard not to look at it, act completely natural. That was new.

She stood off in the corner, pretending to be extremely interested in the new WWE magazine. Camera wasn't quite on her yet, she just looked like an anonymous bystander.

"So Miz, Alex Riley and yourself are in a match tonight against Justin Gabriel and Heath Slater. What are your feelings regarding fighting the Nexus?"an interviewer was saying.

"Honestly, I wanted to stay away from them. They don't intimidate me one bit, I could easily bring them down, I just really wanted to focus on other things…and other people…hold that thought," he said, staring at the 'random bystander' which was Vanessa behind him.

The cameraman switched to show Vanessa.

The Miz walked over to her, checking out what she was looking at.

"See something you like?" he asked, pointing to the page.

She looked up, her eyes dancing with flames. Not flames of fury, but the instant chemistry that was scripted so well.

"I do now," she said, tossing the magazing aside and walking towards him.

"Well then we...have a mutual understanding of each other," the Miz said, snaking his arm around her shoulders. "Accompany me to my match tonight, gorgeous," he said to her, loud enough for the cameras to hear but quiet enough to make it sound passionate.

"I'll accompany you wherever you like," she purred, letting herself give into the fake emotions.

The Miz chuckled, and the camera caught them both walking away towards the end of the hallway.

The red recording light snapped off. "Alright, guys, great job!" the cameraman said, scurrying on to his next task.

"You did amazing," th Miz said to her.

"Thanks, you were a great partner in crime," she laughed, pushing his still-snaked arm from her shoulders.

"I'll meet you in gorilla position—by the curtains—in twenty minutes. I'm glad to be the one showing you off," he teased, walking away.

She thanked him again, then went back towards the way she came.

_What the fuck did gorilla position mean? Curtains, yes I understand. Monkeys? I don't get it._

"Hey, girl!" a sweet voice chirped from behind her.

A blonde with some pink pieces came toward her, a huge smile on her face. "I saw your promo! I'm glad to meet you, finally. I've heard talk of you being here. "

"Thanks," Vanessa said, raising an eyebrow. Again, she felt intimidated. This girl probably laughed with her friends about her, about how she just gets to follow around a mid-card Superstar for a few months. No real talent there.

"Oh, gosh. Where are my manners? I'm Natalie Niedhart. Or Nattie, for short."

"Vanessa," she said, her weight shifting to one leg. She tried hard not to be so awkward, but she really, really couldn't help it.

"Well, Vanessa, come get a quick snack with me before you go down to ringside. You should meet some people," she said, pulling on her arm. "By the way, cute boots."

"Thank you," Vanessa replied, feeling a little bit at ease. Nattie seemed to be genuine. She always had a hard time with girls, mostly because they were so catty behind each other's backs.

"_Ew, have you seen those scars? That's some seriously bad plastic surgery," Monique had said, wrinkling her nose. "Pay the money and have it done right. No guy wants to see that."_

Quickly shaking away the memories from the past, Vanessa followed, into a small room with a few tables set up. A few people were scattered here and there, none of which she'd already met.

Nattie got a turkey sandwich and a bottle of water, and Vanessa got yogurt. She kept her eye on the clock.

They took a chair next to a guy sporting a pink and black ensemble and a small fluff of hair. He looked ridiculous, but apparently Nattie didn't think so as she gave him a kiss on the cheek.

"Hey, TJ, this is Vanessa," she said, using her thumb to point. "Vanessa, this is TJ, my boyfriend."

"'Sup," he answered in reply, focused on a sandwich of his own.

"So here's the rundown of people in the room," she said. "The little tiny blonde over there? That's Michelle McCool. She's pretty nice. Her buddy Layla, though, not so much. They're usually on Smackdown, but with them holding the unified divas championship, they get to make appearances here, too."

Vanessa watched as the bubbly blonde threw a grape at her friend, who tried to catch it in her mouth. They reminded her of middle schoolers, really. Like they still needed to grow up.

"Over on the other side of the room, the two guys over there? The little guy is Evan Bourne. Bigger guy is John Hennigan—or Morrison, to the fans."

Vanessa couldn't help but take note of John. He was really, _really_ sexy. Unfortunately, he was certainly not her type; definitely too much of a pretty boy.

Nattie groaned quietly. "Great," she said, "Raw's biggest asshole has entered the building."

Vanessa looked up, seeing a tall, chiseled man enter the room. His hair was cut close to his head, and his eyes flashed angrily.

"Randy Orton, if you didn't know," she whispered. "He wasn't always an asshole, from what I've heard. But he is now. Even worse since his wife served him with divorce papers," she added, looking back at Vanessa. "He's on the prowl, girl, and you're hot. Better be careful, he's ruthless."

"On the prowl, as in, trying to get laid?" Vanessa asked. As badly as she wanted to deny it, she couldn't; having him for a night couldn't be that bad…

"Like you wouldn't believe. He's hurtin' pretty bad. And, being the way he is, he's got the use 'em and lose 'em attitude."

Vanessa looked back up at him, surprised when she'd met his eyes. She didn't even realize he was watching her and Nattie.

_Oh my god, what if he heard? What if he's going to call us out on it, start some trouble? He doesn't look like the kind of trouble I need._

But, as she said goodbye to Nattie and left, he said nothing. He watched her leave, giving her a really creepy feeling.


	4. Fake

**Disclaimer: It is not a secret that I don't own WWE or any affiliation with it, characters, events, or sponsors mentioned in this story. **

**A/N: I'm so glad so many people like this! I enjoy reading people's guesses. I thought of this idea literally on a whim, I'm so happy with where it's going. Keep the reviews coming, and I'll keep writing. **

Feeling completely overwhelmed by all these people, Vanessa walked quickly towards the exit. She'd gotten word that Bryan would take her back to the hotel, and something would get set up from there. The night was a really, really long one. She couldn't wait to just lay down and relax, even though she wished it was in her own bed.

She'd managed not to make a complete fool of herself at ringside with Miz. In fact, after the match, Stephanie made another appearance in the Diva's locker room.

"I'm impressed, Vanessa," she'd said, "you sure make your love and passion for Mike look legit." She winked before she left again, off to fulfill whatever other duties she had that night.

"Oh, look who it is," an accented voice said. Exactly the person Vanessa hoped it wasn't.

"Same to you," she replied coldly, turning back towards the exit.

Of course, the rude guy that Phil had earlier pointed out to be Wade Barret _had_ to bethe person she ran into next. It couldn't be Phil himself, or hell, even the John Morrison guy. She couldn't get that lucky.

"So, listen," Wade said. "About what happened earlier…"

"You had it coming," she cut him off. "Go ahead, act like you're sorry or whatever. But I'm not." Vanessa always thought she'd been a good judgement of character, and this particular guy really set off her radars.

"Really, darling, why do you have to be like that?" he asked, his hand resting against the wall.

She scoffed, a million comebacks coming to her head. Before she could blurt one out, Bryan walked up, wearing his street clothes that she'd met him in.

"Sorry, Wade," he said. "I don't mean to break this up, but we gotta get going."

Wade chuckled to himself. "Yeah, yeah. I'm sure you do. Vanessa has quite the agenda, after all."

When he walked away, Bryan turned back toward her. "What the hell? I heard that you somehow managed to severely piss off Randy Orton, enough for him to shoot daggers at you with his eyes. Now I see Wade Barret being the dick that he is. What's the deal with you attracting trouble?"

Vanessa shrugged. "I didn't do anything to Randy Orton. The guy just wouldn't stop staring at me. Like…almost like I was a Thanksgiving meal."

"Christ, to him, you probably are. The guy's fucked up and lonely right now. Ask around, he's trying hard to patch up his ego."

"Yeah, I heard. I feel bad for him," Vanessa admitted, opening the door to exit the arena.

"Don't. The guy's a jerk."

Vanessa wanted to press forward. She wanted to know everything about everyone. Since she didn't really know anyone at all, what could be the harm in hearing what others thought?

_Oh yeah. Except it's probably not the total truth._

After an uncomfortable silence, Bryan flipped on the radio.

"You did really well tonight, by the way," he said. "I honestly didn't know what to expect from you."

"Thank you," she replied, a little more bitterly than she'd intended.

"And you had the guys flocking to you, whether you realized it or not. If I wasn't so into focusing on me right now, I'd been one of them."

This made her laugh. She was glad that she didn't feel pressured around him, like she had to be a perfect girl. In fact, maybe this would be a really good friendship. She needed one of those.

Once they got to the hotel back near the airport she'd arrived at earlier, she opened the car door and observed what was going on. It almost felt like the first day of school all over again, except instead of buses, there were limousines, and divas were squealing giving each other hugs as they entered the hotel lobby together.

Vanessa felt like the shy new kid that nobody knew.

"Alright there, Baby V?" Bryan asked, slinging a duffel strap over his shoulder.

"Overwhelmed, all over again," she replied, to which Bryan smiled.

Checking in was a nobody was certain whether or not she'd actually show up, nobody thought to book an extra room. Naturally, they didn't have any vacancies, and Bryan, of course, already had a roommate.

"We can always put three in a room," the hotel clerk said to her, "But one of you's going to end up on the couch."

Vanessa couldn't help but to feel panicked. How she longed to sleep in an actual bed after the rough night she had!

"She can stay with us, if she doesn't mind being with two guys," a man stepped up, offering his assistance.

She turned to look at him, and a smile crept up on her face. The nice guy, Phil, and that John Hennigan guy were offering to help her out. She wanted to hug them both.

"It's up to the lady, then," the clerk said, starting to retrieve a hotel key. She didn't even have to agree, everyone knew what the answer was going to be.

She took the key from him, and thanked the men a thousand times.

"It's no big deal," Phil told her. "Nothing's ever organized in this company."

"Well, it's a big deal to me. Couch or no couch, it's better than sleeping in the lobby, you know?"

"Couch is mine," Phil said. "It pulls out to be a bed, anyways. Come on, I'll show you where to put your bags."

Almost instantly, Vanessa could smell boy. It wasn't overwhelming, thankfully. It almost reminded her of the smell of a gym.

"Is it cool with you guys if I go ahead and take a shower? I mean…I know you have to keep up your appearances," she said, nodding in John's direction, "But I would love getting all this goddamn hairspray out."

"Yeah, go ahead," John said. "And by the way, I don't really have to worry about keeping up my appearance. I'm just naturally this good looking."

"Naturally that cocky, too?"she asked, shutting the door behind her.

She peeled off her clothes, leaving a small, neat pile on the floor. She looked at herself in the mirror. Even though she had been told hundreds of times that she had the curves that any woman would want, she still found herself longing for a body more like Michelle McCool's. She finally stepped out of her lacey underwear and bra,turned the shower on hot, and stepped in, letting the water melt away the fake hair, fake face. If only it could wash away the fake past she was creating for herself.


	5. Not So Private Conversations

**Disclaimer: It is not a secret that I don't own WWE or any affiliation with it, characters, events, or sponsors mentioned in this story. Also, any song lyrics and bands, I don't own. **

**A/N: I'm so glad so many people like this! I enjoy reading people's guesses. I thought of this idea literally on a whim, I'm so happy with where it's going. Keep the reviews coming, and I'll keep writing. **

Wrapping herself up in the plush white bathrobe hanging on the back of the door, Vanessa felt a thousand times better. She always loved taking showers after a long day at work, and it definitely made her feel better.

She walked out of the bathroom, her hair still dripping wet. John was nowhere to be found, but Phil was sitting on the pull-out bed, listening to his iPod and reading a book.

As soon as he saw her, he pulled out the earphones and put down his book.

"Listening to anything good?" she asked, trying hard not to be overly sensual. She didn't want to give Phil the impression that she wanted him, and was trying to seduce him. She found this a difficult task with only a bathrobe on.

"It depends on what you think of as 'good,'" Phil replied, looking as though he was slightly embarrassed to see her almost naked.

"Try me," she grinned, sliding next to him.

Phil caved in, handing her an earphone. As soon as the slow, sad intro hit, Vanessa felt like she'd stepped into Phil's soul. She always believed that the kind of music people listened to told a lot about their personalities; after all, most lyrics people related to, re-telling a part of their own story. This song, Vanessa realized, was no exception:

_Lately I've been hard to reach,_

_I've been too long on my own._

_Everybody has a private world where they can be alone._

_Are you calling me?_

_Are you trying to get through?_

_Are you reaching out for me?_

_I'm reaching out for you._

"I like it," Vanessa stated, handing back the earpiece. "What is it?"

"Eminem," he replied coolly.

"What? The skinny white guy who always raps about critics?" she wrinkled her nose. She remembered the old Slim Shady days…the bleach blonde hair created a huge trend within the industry. And, unfortunately, the look didn't really work well on any guy.

"The very same. But his last few CDs, I found myself really enjoying. Normally, I stick to Shinedown, stuff like that."

At that moment, John walked back in, a huge pizza box in his hands.

"Whoa, man. I can leave if…" he trailed off, instantly noticing Vanessa's partial nudity, turned toward his friend on the couch.

Vanessa laughed, throwing a pillow at him once he put the box on the table in front of them. She missed, but barely. She grabbed a handful of clothes from her duffel, re-entering the bathroom and sticking her tongue out playfully at John.

When she emerged again, her hair was beginning to air-dry, leaving the familiar messy, beachy waves. She wore her favorite black yoga pants and a yellow tank top that showed off the natural tan of her half-Latina skin.

The boys were flipping through the channels, both shoveling down the sausage pizza. John had a can of beer next to him, and Phil, a soda.

"Wow, guys. Save some for the rest of us," she said, pulling her dark hair back into a ponytail before finding a spot on the floor next to them.

As she knelt down, her tank top rode up slightly, revealing her only tattoo: a black tribal stretching across the small of her back. Flying over the V-shaped middle was another tattoo, a blackbird flying over. A sign, her mama had always told her, that danger was near.

"Hey," John said, his mouth full of pizza. He gulped it down, and pointed at her back. "I like the ink. I think I've seen it before, though. Not so original," he said, giving her a quick wink.

Vanessa wanted to tell him that yes, it was completely original. That in fact, her uncle Antonio had designed the entire tattoo for her, each twist of the tribal symbolizing another turning point in her life. But she held her tongue; she knew if she told him the truth, he could easily connect the dots. Then, everyone would know her truth.

"I found it online, but I liked it so much that I had to get it done," she replied, grabbing a slice of her own, and stuffing the end of it into her mouth. She prayed that if she looked like she was busy, neither of them would ask more questions, and she didn't have to keep weaving this web of lies.

Halfway through the slice, the familiar shrill of her cell phone began to go off, signaling a call. She sighed,hoping that it was someone she actually wanted to talk to. When she looked at the caller ID, though, she realized having any hope of that was too much to talk to. Why would he be calling now?

"Vanessa," she said, her eyes narrowing as she slipped into the hallway. She glanced around quickly, and only one person was around, and they seemed to be headed away.

"Vanessa, baby, we saw you on that show of yours! Stunning as always," the voice on the other end chirped.

"Thanks," she replied, getting anxious to end the call already.

"No problem, love. You're lucky we got the ins with the company and Mr. McMahon after that whole Chyna Doll fiasco. Pulling a few strings, though, for my favorite girl in the industry…no big deal."

"Really, I can't thank you enough," she replied, and she meant it.

"Though, I can't imagine why you'd want to ditch out on the company. Girl, you had it made! You had the most hits on Google since…"

"Yeah, I know," she cut him off. "I just needed to figure out exactly what I was looking for in my life."

"I understand completely, love. Just call dear old Ronnie up anytime, and you've still got a career here with us. We've got plenty of ideas coming at us, but not nearly the same amount of talent as our golden girl."

"Thank you, Ronnie; I'll keep that in mind. Oh, say hello to the boyfriend for me."

"Oh of course, darling! He'll be happy to hear from you! Come visit us soon," he clicked his tongue, and Vanessa could just sense the flamboyancy in his voice. He really made no effort to hide his sexuality, and Vanessa liked him for that. Ronnie never pretended to be something he wasn't.

Guilt crept over her. She was pretending, yet Ronnie showed it off to the world.

"I will, Ronnie, I promise," she said, shaking the negativity away.

"Ooh, and give that Randy Orton fellow a good pinch on the rear for me!" he hung up on her, laughing.

As much as she liked her old manager, the company was beginning to take an emotional toll on her. She never hoped to make a career of it, and only really used it to pay her way through technical college. But the company saw a huge increase in sales, and that increase increased a pay raise of her own. Walking away from that was really hard, but she kept reminding herself that she was doing the right thing for _her_.

She turned to go back into the room, completely oblivious to the figure a bit down the hall, who had just heard most of her private conversation.


	6. Offers

**Disclaimer: It is not a secret that I don't own WWE or any affiliation with it, characters, events, or sponsors mentioned in this story. Also, any song lyrics and bands, I don't own. **

**A/N: I'm beginning to notice that this story is less popular than I'd hoped. I'm starting to wonder whether or not this is a bum idea. **** On the other hand, I really enjoy writing this one. I also am starting to think I might bump up the rating for this, especially because as the writer, I already know what's going to happen…and it may be necessary to bump the rating. **

The man was completely puzzled. A few guys kept saying she looked familiar, maybe a groupie from the past. But heknew better; she didn't quite fit into that stereotype. She wasn't a bleach-blonde, and she certainly wasn't ready and willing to jump into bed with any wrestler that noticed her. In fact, she didn't really seem to know anything about the company at all.

Although, he thought, having Vanessa all over him wouldn't be a bad thing, she just didn't show that kind of interest at all.

So who was this girl? Why was she one of the few ladies who preferred to remain mysterious? He had only been part of the WWE for a short while, but he could already tell most the Divas on the Raw roster strived for the limelight. Vanessa, on the other hand, walked into a room and immediately, the light seemed to shine on her, even if it wasn't meant to be that way.

_There's something really, really strange going on here,_ he thought. _Vince doesn't usually offer a job to people who have no interest in the company. _

His first thought was that Vince somehow owed her. But that couldn't be right; the McMahon's were usually owed something from other people.

He began to walk down the hallway towards a vending machine.

Maybe he had been looking too far into this. She didn't really look familiar to him at all; he was certain he'd remember the striking beauty. On the other hand, it seemed that a handful of guys did recognize her, but nobody could recall from where.

The only hope he had was to get to know her, then maybe she'd reveal something. Unfortunately, he'd already made himself out to be an asshole. Not to mention he was unsure if he really wanted to get twisted into whatever drama her life held.

He could, perhaps, reveal to everyone the truth. Her truth.

That's when he decided that maybe, just maybe, he'd offer her a deal that she would be silly to refuse.

Vanessa arrived at Raw the next week with both Phil on John, having had bonded with them both so well over the time they spent together. She was so glad that she was fitting in pretty well. Still, she knew deep down that things would drastically change for her if anyone knew what was beneath the surface. The things she'd done.

"Ready for round two?" Phil asked her, giving her a toothy grin that she couldn't help but adore. Just as she expected, she had begun to crush on the straight edged superstar. She hoped he felt the same, yet still, she worried about him getting too close.

"I was born ready," she faked a macho attitude, which only made the two men laugh.

They split up, and she gave them both small hugs for good luck. She caught the smell of Phil's cologne, which triggered naughtier thoughts…

Quickly shaking her mind of clutter, she started towards the Diva locker room.

"Hey, you," a man called. She turned, hoping it was Bryan. But, again, she could never be that lucky; and Wade Barret stood, towering over her. She could almost see straight up his crooked nose.

"You again? I thought I got through to you; I think you're an asshole."

Wade snorted. "No, no, darling. You made that perfectly clear. But I have an offer for you that I'd easily be able to pitch to the creative team."

A million comebacks came back, but she held her tongue.

He started up again. "I'd like you to consider joining the Nexus. We can offer you protection, with our strength in numbers. That way, you won't ever have to worry about getting hurt. About jealous girls. Or about people trying to_ get to know you._"

Vanessa jumped a little at the edge he had in the last few words. For a moment, she thought maybe, just maybe, he knew her secret. But no, that couldn't be right…nobody knew, and she had Mr. McMahon's word that he'd do his damnest to keep it that way.

"The only person I really need protection from is you," she said, glaring. "You keep hunting me down like this, and it's kinda making me think you're stalking me."

Wade put on his cocky grin. "Love, the Nexus know what it's like to be at the bottom. To have people doubt your ability. I mean, come on, they put you in a love story with 'The Miz!' Adding a pretty face to the Nexus might be the best idea yet."

Vanessa couldn't help but to feel like he was somehow tricking her. She so far had no reason to trust this guy, and she certainly didn't like him that much. He had an awful personality.

But maybe, just like her, he was hiding something in the interior.

"I don't know," she said, running her hand through her hair. She looked down, and noticed how monstrous his feet were. She probably could put three of her own feet in one of his boots.

"You don't have to know right now. I just thought I'd put the offer out don't have to be best friends, Vanessa, but that doesn't mean we can't have a common goal."

He turned to walk away, leaving her in her thoughts. This was an excellent opportunity to start fresh, and she knew it. But she really liked working with Mike, and she didn't want to jump ship so quickly. After deliberation the entire rest of the walk to the locker room, she'd finally decided to wait it out, and see where her storylines with Mike went.

"Hey girlie!" squealed the blonde-and-pink haired diva. "Missed you over the weekend!" she bounced over, giving Vanessa a huge hug, like they'd been pals forever.

"Thanks, Nat, missed you all too," she said, trying to match the enthusiasm. She couldn't; Nattie was just naturally an overly bubbly person.

"I heard you spent a lot of time with Punk!" she said, smiling. "He's a real nice guy. You'd tell me if anything was going on between you two, right?"

"Of course. Maybe eventually, but we just get along really well."

The other woman seemed to be happy with that answer. Her expression suddenly turned serious. "Did you know that after your appearances last week, the Web has been crazy with Vanessa Paradise? Everyone is dying to know more!"

_Oh god. Please god, don't let anyone let the words roll of their tongue._

"I hope to give them more, soon," Vanessa answered. "But what fun is it if everyone already knows me before I have one foot into the company?"

"Fair enough! But I gotta let you get going, I've got a match against the two baddest bitches in the arena," she said, pointing over to Michelle McCool. Vanessa really couldn't tell if, by her tone, she was kidding or not.

The blonde skipped away, leaving Vanessa to an empty locker room, yet again.


	7. Butterflies

**Disclaimer: It is not a secret that I don't own WWE or any affiliation with it, characters, events, or sponsors mentioned in this story. Also, any song lyrics and bands, I don't own. **

**A/N: I'm beginning to notice that this story is less popular than I'd hoped. I'm starting to wonder whether or not this is a bum idea. **** On the other hand, I really enjoy writing this one. I had to bump the rating, because I already know where I want to go with this. **

Throughout the entire time while she was getting her naturally crazy hair tamed, Vanessa couldn't ignore Wade's words. They continued to swim through her mind. She had to admit, she was more on the fence about the entire offer than she'd let on. Protecting herself was probably the wisest choice.

_What if waiting it out is completely wrong?_

The Miz was a superstar who, no doubt, was growing in popularity. She'd been told previously that they would help each other continue to grow. But, of course, she'd just been offered the protection from the most powerful stable currently in the WWE…

"All done, Vanessa," the young woman working on her hair said, holding up a mirror for Vanessa's inspection.

"Damn," Vanessa said, looking at the work that was done. After three different types of product, the girl who called herself Jess managed to completely straighten and smooth down the jungle princess hair. It was weird seeing it so perfect, but even weirder seeing it straight; after all, she'd always been told that the curly hair was better for show, especially while on camera.

"You're so much easier to work with than others," Jess said, her tired eyes trying to match her smile.

"So I've heard," Vanessa said, quickly realizing she came off a little bitchy. She apologized, saying it didn't mean to come out like she was stuck up or anything. Jess didn't seem to notice either way; she was too busy loading on the heavy eyeshadow to Vanessa's dark eyes.

She thanked Jess for all of her work, and Jess called to begin working on Eve, who was off gossiping with Michelle McCool on the opposite side of the room. Vanessa felt her gut wrench; girls gossiping never was a good thing. Were they talking about her? Neither of them particularly had warmed up to her, after all.

She left the locker room feeling extremely paranoid, hoping to run into the Miz to get ready for their promo. Instead, she was met with a familiar voice, who called to her: "Baby V!"

She looked to see both Bryan and Phil over by the coffee cart, smiling and waving for her to come over. The gut-wrenching feeling in her stomach was gone completely, instead, butterflies replaced it. It was a completely new, strange feeling for her; having legitimate feelings for a guy. But she was falling for Phil quickly, and he completely respected her. She'd always tried to keep feelings out of her work, and mostly, she'd been successful. Of course, there was that one time…

"Hey guys," she said, knowing full well she was on a strict time schedule.

"You look gorgeous, as always," Bryan said, flipping the end of her straight black hair with his index finger.

"You haven't seen her in the morning, I take it, and"Phil said jokingly, "some of us had to see the monster in the morning."

Vanessa, of course, socked him in the arm playfully, but hard enough to make him groan. She thanked Bryan for not being a dick, watching Phil the entire time, flirting with her eyes.

"Listen, V. I heard Barret asked you to consider joining the Nexus," Bryan said, his features darkening, as if he'd just been forced to say the foulest word in the English language.

"Yeah," she replied. "And so what? I didn't give him an answer. That's a lot to think about. Besides, it's only my second show…that would be a bitch move to do that right away."

"Well, it's spreading throughout the entire locker room like wildfire. They don't have many friends, V. Think about it really well before you do anything rash."

Vanessa shrugged, not really wanting to be told what to do. She focused on Phil, and she hoped her heart wasn't beating as loud as it seemed to be. "All work drama aside, are you busy tonight? My hairdresser was telling me about a little diner downtown. We could go—and definitely invite John to come, too," she added quickly.

Phil nodded slowly. "Sure, I think I can fit you into the schedule," he said, his eyes sparkling. "I'll meet you here after the show, and I'll let Johnny know, too. Sound good?"

She agreed, hastily walking toward her original destination. Part of her wished she hadn't invited the Shaman of Sexy to come along. She kind of felt like he was slightly jealous that her attention was on the straight edge society leader. On the other hand, having him there might be a nice buffer…if things became too awkward, at least he might be able to smooth things over. All she really wanted, though, was to really get to know Phil. Maybe eventually, she could tell him the truth. Of course, that'd be far down the road, when she was certain that she trusted him not to just ditch out and leave.

Again, she got lost in her own thoughts, trying to map out exactly the questions she wanted to know about Phil. This time, though, she ran directly into a massive body, already wearing his wrestling trunks. Tattoos stared back at her, and her eyes grew wide with both anxiety and nerves.

"Oops…I'm so sorry," she squeaked, feeling like a child who got caught sneaking candy before dinner.

He just stared at her, a confused look written on his face. She watched his eyes slowly narrow, as though he could see right through her. She was completely transparent. The same cold, angry stare greeted her apology as the last time she'd been around this man.

Luckily, Mike turned the corner, happy to see his partner, wearing his black t-shirt and trunks, completely ready to go.

"There you are, Vanessa!" he said, his eyes shifting to the taller man.

"G'd evening, Orton," he said, trying hard to be respectful.

Randy grunted in reply, then, for the first time Vanessa had ever heard, spoke: "Tell your little tramp to watch herself. She doesn't want to cross the wrong person."

He didn't wait for a response from the pair; instead, he walked away, looking pompous and leaving them speechless.

"Whatever you did to that guy," Mike said slowly, watching his words so they weren't audible for Randy to hear, "He really hates you for it."

She shook her head, then whispered back, "I didn't do anything. At least, I don't think so. He just hates me for some reason."

"Maybe because you're not swooning at his feet like most women," Mike replied, draping an arm around her shoulder, beginning to lead her to the camera crew.

"Well, arrogant asshole isn't exactly my type," she said. There was no denying that Orton was hot, but, the same as Barret, had the cockiness issue. Women had to have really low self-worth if they would hop in bed with either of them when they treated them like that.

_Ugh, who am I to put down other women's self-worth?_ She thought guiltily.

"It's almost go-time," Mike said, straightening his shirt. He leaned forward and tucked a strand of Vanessa's hair back, then gave her a thumbs-up.

_At least,_ she thought to herself, _I have a good business partner that I actually get along with. Can the same be said for the Nexus?_


	8. A Business Opportunity

**Disclaimer: It is not a secret that I don't own WWE or any affiliation with it, characters, events, or sponsors mentioned in this story. In this particular chapter, I do not own **_**Playboy**_** or anything to do with it. **

**A/N: I'm beginning to notice that this story is less popular than I'd hoped. I'm starting to wonder whether or not this is a bum idea. **** On the other hand, I really enjoy writing this one. I had to bump the rating, because I already know where I want to go with this. Also, many apologies for this chapter, it's simply filler.**

"And I think you should know…if you win the match tonight against Daniel Bryan…you'll be receiving more than just the United States Championship as a reward," Vanessa purred, rubbing her hand across Miz's shirted chest. She looked up to him hungrily, as if he was everything she'd ever wanted in a man.

The crowd all hollered at her innuendo, and cat calls rang through the arena.

"What do you mean, _if_? With an offer like that, how can I possibly let myself lose?" The Miz said cockily. "Besides, you know who I am. Everyone should. I'm the Miz, and I'm….awesome."

"Alright, guys, nice work!" the camera crew rushed off to their next backstage destination.

"You're such a good actress," Miz said, giving his goofy smile. "Especially if you can fake being into me that well. Unless, of course, you actually are," he winked at her, and Vanessa instantly knew he was kidding with her.

_Thank God, too,_ she thought, _because Mike's too nice a guy to let down._

After departing, and agreeing to meet again in an hour, Vanessa went towards catering, hoping to find anyone other than Wade Barret.

"Vanessa!" the bouncy blonde friend came toward her, a smile plastered on her face.

_Jesus, does this girl ever just chill?_

"Hey, Nat," she said, failing, as always, to match the enthusiasm she gave off.

"So, a bunch of us are going to go out later tonight. You should definitely come and get to know people!"

Vanessa chewed on her lip. "Well, I have plans with Phil…but I'm sure I could meet you guys after that. It'd be cool to have a crazy night for once; I haven't done that in ages."

"Ohmigod, awesome!" she replied, giving Vanessa a dramatic hug. A look of curiosity suddenly spread across her face. "Wait, you mean you have a date?" she said, looking up to her friend.

"Kind of…with both Phil and Hennigan," she replied. "We got to be pretty tight over the hotel stay last week."

She laughed. "Oh, I see how it is! You little player, you," she winked, and then bounded away.

Vanessa couldn't help but to like the girl. She had the greatest personality of any diva she'd met. Not that she'd gotten really close to any, but Natalie was so naturally happy. Maybe slightly annoying at times, sure, but her smile was infectious.

Vanessa grabbed a bottle of water from catering, then took a seat. She was so anxious for the rest of the night, all she wanted was to have a fast-forward button. There was not really any mystery left in the show for her; after all, Miz would triumph over Daniel Bryan after a few interferences. The only mystery was WHO was going to be interfering aside from her, which was completely up to Stephanie, and she'd queue the person five minutes before he was to make an appearance.

She sat by herself, alone for once, no random run-ins or heated discussions. No, she was alone with her thoughts, which was always a little nerve-wrecking. Yet, at the same time, she rejoiced that she had peace and quiet to herself.

Suddenly, her cell phone tinkered, and her heart jumped. She never knew who was trying to get hold of her. She glanced at the caller ID, and didn't recognize the number.

"Hello?" she answered, keeping her voice hushed so that if it was an old associate, she wouldn't give her cover away.

"Vanessa? Why do you sound so far away? If that building is hard to get a signal in again, I'll threaten them up and down…" the gruff voice on the other side went off on a tangent.

"Sorry, Mr. McMahon," she said, bringing her voice up louder.

"Ah, that's better, then. Vanessa, as you may have heard, your popularity is growing within the WWE universe."

"I've heard a little about it," she admitted.

"Don't be coy! Blogs all over want more of you! I'm starting to wonder if I should change storylines, put you with a more popular superstar to maximize whatever it is you've got,"

"Oh, Mr. McMahon, that's not necessary. I'm very happy where I am right now. Besides, if I just get thrown in with a bigger star, you and I will miss out on the climbing ratings to see what could happen next."

She could practically hear Mr. McMahon's smile over the phone. "Oh, I knew you were a smart girl. You're speaking my language perfectly. But, I actually called to discuss another business opportunity."

"Oh?" she said, her curiosity perking up.

"I have a good friend who's interested in you. You may know him. Hugh Hefner?"

Vanessa wanted to vomit a thousand times over. Yes, _Playboy_ was much more tasteful than what she'd been through, but hadn't she already paraded around wearing nothing enough for one person?

"Don't knock it right away, Vanessa. I'd really like you to consider this. Your shoot wouldn't be for a few months, but by then, I'm thinking you'll have a little bit of your own merchandise."

"Yes, sir. I'll certainly consider it," she said, her stomach still in knots. She had a feeling that she would let down a lot of people, including her familia, if she did something like this. She also hoped, in a few months, that Phil would be more than just a friend. There's no way that someone like him would give two-thumbs up to a nude shoot.

"Good, good. I'm hoping to let him know in about a month. I should be in contact with you, then. And keep up the great work."

"Thank you very much, sir," she replied, feeling smaller than ever. When she had hung up, she truly felt the only reason she was hired was to rake in as much money for the company as possible. And, it wasn't the nice way that Natalie was doing it. No, it was because Mr. McMahon knew who she was and what she was capable of doing.

_Don't be so stupid, how many Divas have posed for Playboy before you?_

_Yeah, but how many have lowered themselves as low as you have?_

The inner battle broke out, and she had to just relax or her performance tonight would be shit. She put her head in her hands, trying her hardest to de-stress, when suddenly, someone tapped her shoulder.

"Vanessa?"

She shot up, apologizing immediately. "Am I late? Did I fall asleep? I'm so sorry, it's been a tough day."

Mike shook his head. "No, you just looked down. But it is almost time for our match. Let's start gandering over that way and you can tell me what's on your mind."

She got up, her knees wobbly.

"Mr. McMahon wants me to do a _Playboy_ shoot," she finally confessed after an uncomfortable silence.

He let out a low whistle. "Already? Most Divas have to be here at least a year before they get considered."

"I guess," she paused, choosing her words carefully, "I'm not most Divas."

"True," he agreed. "There have been a lot of women who have done it, V. Just because you're naked doesn't mean it's disgusting. Think Candice Michelle, or Joanie Laurer. It's not like you're having sex or anything."

At that, she stopped completely in her tracks.

"What did you say?" she asked, feeling like her words were poisonous.

She didn't mean them to be. She didn't mean to snap like that. Was it possible that her partner was told a little bit extra about her since they'd be working in such close proximity?

"I didn't mean to offend you, Vanessa. I'm sorry. I just think there are worse things you could be doing than taking a few naked pictures."

By now, she was shaking. It was like he was giving voice to her deepest opinions, secrets, and covers.

"Are you okay? Are you going to be sick? You're kinda pale…"

"I'm fine," she said, trying hard to contain herself.

"Just take a deep breath," he said. She obeyed, but she was still over-anxious about the entire conversation they'd just had.

And with that, The Miz's entrance music hit, and she knew it was time to put her game face on. No matter how many times she had to do something for her job that she didn't want to do, she knew that for the cameras, she had to fake it.


	9. Mistakes

**Disclaimer: It is not a secret that I don't own WWE or any affiliation with it, characters, events, or sponsors mentioned in this story. **

**A/N: Yes, that last chapter basically laid out what Vanessa's been hiding from everyone. I would love some more reviews, just to see how you guys actually like the story. Don't be shy! **

"And now, making his way to the ring, weighing in at 255 lbs., he is your United States Champion…Daniel Bryan!"

As her frenemy made his way down the ramp, Vanessa stood in the center of the ring alongside The Miz, her hands on her hips and her mouth pursed. To all the fans, it would appear that she was pissed off and disgusted by the sight of Daniel Bryan. But in all reality, she was still very much in a foul mood thanks to her partner. She couldn't really say they'd gotten into a spat; in fact, she didn't think Mike realized he'd pushed her buttons. How could he know if he didn't know who she really was?

Like a good girl, though, during the match, Vanessa watched to two men like a hawk, waiting for the moment where she was supposed to interfere. She urged him on, pounding on the apron, whenever The Miz was down. She almost felt that being at ringside gave the match an entirely new feel, and even the spectators were clearly interested in who would win.

It was hard to pretend the crowd wasn't there, though. That was tough to get used to. Somehow, she managed to ignore them, but she couldn't ignore a sign a male fan was holding up for the camera.

"I'll take you to Paradise, Vanessa!" it read. This kind of brought up her spirits; it was nice seeing the fans take a liking to her rather than hear about it from her peers.

While The Miz was in complete control, a sudden burst of music came through the speakers. Vanessa was unprepared, and she started worrying that maybe she'd missed her queue.

_No…I've been watching carefully so that didn't happen…_

Although she didn't recognize the entrance music, she did recognize the man on the stage holding a microphone.

"Now, Miz," he said, the fans loudly cheering and making him less audible. "How is it that you get a hot girl to swoon as well as a title shot? Surely, you didn't do a thing to deserve either. To be honest, you're just…average." The last bit of CM Punk's schpeel seemed to sting the other man, who stood at the edge of the ring on the bottom rope, shouting obscenities and motioning Punk to come down to the ring.

At that moment, Vanessa saw what she'd been waiting for. Bryan—or, Daniel Bryan, rather—was down, but slowly getting to his knees. Quickly, she got into position for her own interference.

"Don't get so upset, Miz. I'm just simply stating the very question that's on everybody's mind."

In a flash, Vanessa jumped up on the apron, and at the same time, Daniel Bryan tried to catch his opponent off-guard, rolling him up into a sneaky pin. The referee, however, didn't see the pin in order to count. He was too busy yelling at her to get off the apron or she'd be banned from ringside.

As it was meant to be, her little distraction bought The Miz enough time to reverse the pin. She jumped down immediately, forcing the referee to turn his focus back to the match. Daniel Bryan was struggling to get out of the pin, but it was to no avail; there was a three-count, and he had lost the title.

The Miz threw his hands up in the air, and Vanessa climbed into the ring to celebrate with him. Daniel Bryan had pure shock written all over his face. He turned towards her, yelling about how she'd managed to ruin everything. It was hard to keep a straight face, especially since Vanessa knew that he was one of the nicest men on the entire Raw roster.

He took a step closer to her, still yelling, and she pushed him back. This only infuriated him more, and he pushed her back twice as hard. The Miz was behind her to break her fall, a look of bewilderment shot towards Daniel Bryan.

"Hey man, come on!" he yelled, shielding his on-screen girlfriend.

CM Punk came from nowhere, lunging at the couple and missing Vanessa by only inches. She hadn't seen him come down the ramp, let alone the ring.

_God damn, no wonder they don't tell me everything. They like to ad-lib a lot to keep suspense!_

The Miz lashed back at CM Punk, who was caught completely off-guard, and he fell to his knees.

CM Punk looked up at the Miz, then his dark, soulful eyes turned to Vanessa. He opened his mouth to speak, but instead, blood drooled down his chin.

_Holy fucking shit. He actually hurt him!_

She made the decision to leave her persona behind, which she knew was a huge no-no. But she didn't care, the concern she had for her friend took her over as she rushed to his aide.

"Game face!" he grunted at her, blood splattering as he spoke. "I'll be fine!" his eyes flashed angrily, and he knew full-well that Vanessa's character wasn't supposed to give a shit about anyone besides The Miz.

"Fuck it," she hissed, "you're bleeding, and you mean more than a bunch of fake storylines!"

She knelt down, offering a hand out to the fallen man. Before he could grab it, The Miz cut them off, standing between the two. He saved the scene completely, preventing Vanessa from helping his new-found enemy.

She stood up, thanking her partner for making the scene look like he was just an overprotective asshole. At least it didn't seem like she'd ruined everything to the viewers.

"What the hell were you thinking?" he said under his breath, escorting her out of the ring. She could cut the tension between them in half while they were walking up the ramp. The cameras watched her face all the way up the ramp, capturing the obvious concern for the man still in the ring. Paramedics sprang into action, rushing past her to help.

Once backstage, her partner turned towards her.

"Vanessa, what the fuck?" he asked, clear disappointment in his voice. "You almost botched the entire scene! We could be unemployed by the end of the night!" his nostrils flared, and Vanessa knew she had fucked up big time.

"I'm sorry, Mike. And I don't give a shit if I'm out of a career, Phil could've really been hurt…"

"That's what the fucking paramedics are for!"

"I'm sorry…really. I wasn't thinking straight. I would've done the same for anyone."

Mike scoffed. "I doubt it. Listen, I don't care what feelings you have for him, how many times that guy's hit it, or anything like that. That's your business. But my career? That's my business. Keep your business separate from mine. I take mine seriously."

He jumped suddenly, as another woman came behind them and put an arm around his shoulders.

"Cut it out, you two," she said, and Mike stood straight up.

"Stephanie," he said, his face turning to stone. "Didn't think you'd be here tonight."

"Oh, Mike. When do I ever get a day off? Even when I was 8 and a half months pregnant with Murph, I was still writing scripts from the bed. But enough about me. I'm here to talk to you about _you."_

"Before you fire us both, it was really my fault…" Vanessa said, hoping to save Mike's ass. He didn't deserve the fate that she did, especially after saving the show.

"Fire you? Of course not. Now, Mike, you have every right to be upset with your partner. But you did fantastically, regardless. And Vanessa, this passion for others you have is absolutely perfect."

Vanessa looked at the other woman quizzically, unsure of whether or not it was a compliment.

Stephanie smirked, answering the non-verbal question with ease.

"It'll be the downfall of The Miz and Vanessa Paradise," she said breezily, as if the answer was obvious. "And Phil is the person who's going to break you two up. Clearly. See? It's all going to work out just fine."

Mike hastily agreed that Stephanie was right; that things would be fine. He thanked her for being understanding, then excused himself. He walked away from the two women in a huff, clearly still pissed about the way the night played out.

"Don't worry about him," Stephanie said when he was out of earshot. "You'll notice how mid-cards will get easily frustrated if something should jeopardize a larger push."

"I'm still very sorry," Vanessa replied, sincerity taking over her voice. She almost felt she could start crying.

"Don't be. It means you're human. But, Vanessa, I did realize something."

She didn't answer, and Stephanie didn't wait to continue.

"I know you're a good actress. I've watched your clips with Mike. But, woman to woman, the concern you held with Phil out there tonight was anything but acting."

Vanessa felt her cheeks grow hot. "That was..it…was…nothing," she stumbled over her words, and she knew she was less than convincing.

Stephanie chuckled. "Hon, I wish I believed you. Unfortunately, when Shane called me out on the lovey-dovey eyes towards my husband way back when, I said the exact same thing. You can't lie to yourself forever, and you certainly can't lie to me."

She placed a hand on Vanessa's shoulder, as though they had been the best of friends forever.

"Now, then. I do trust you two can sort out your problems like adults."

It took a moment, but Vanessa realized that Stephanie had switched back to talking about Mike.

"Absolutely," she said, looking at her boss in the eye, trying to maintain confidence.

"Wonderful. Now, I have to get going. Try not to break character again; next time, you might not get so lucky."

"Yes, ma'am."

"Oh, and go after him. Women like us can't just stand around and wait for a man to come." She winked, then left Vanessa standing in the barren hallway.

_Fuck my life. Am I really that transparent?_


	10. Frankenstein

**Disclaimer: It is not a secret that I don't own WWE or any affiliation with it, characters, events, or sponsors mentioned in this story. **

**A/N: Yes, that last chapter basically laid out what Vanessa's been hiding from everyone. I would love some more reviews, just to see how you guys actually like the story. Don't be shy! **

**

* * *

**

_**CM Punk's POV:**_

"Fuck!" I yelled, the stitches hurting like a bitch.

"I'm sorry, I'm being as careful as a needle will allow," the doctor on duty said slowly, eyeing me over the top of his glasses.

I shouldn't be mad at the guy. No, I should be mad at fucking Mizanin. Accident or not, he caused me to bite right through my lip. Not to mention, I'd heard what happened between him and Vanessa afterwards…everyone knew once it had happened; the place was a damn rumor mill.

The thought of Vanessa made me smile. I hated myself for it, but over the past week, we had really hit it off. I promised to myself up and down that after the last few horrible relationships, I would never date another person I worked with.

When I had asked Bryan about her, he told her she'd said she liked to remain mysterious. I absolutely couldn't believe that; the woman is smoking hot yet wants to keep herself from getting a big head over it. My three relationships that I'd had within the company all turned out badly because they had already gotten over-involved in drama. I constantly beat myself up over dating Amy especially; I hadn't realized that Matt and Adam were _still_ fighting over what she'd put them both through. Then, Ashley came into the picture, which Amy called me non-stop over, constantly telling me that, like Matt had, I had replaced her with someone who _wanted to be her_.

But Vanessa…she was different. She was by far the most laid-back girl I had ever met. She didn't need to spend hours with a stylist like many of the Divas here did. She looked damn sexy in her yoga pants and yellow tank top the first night we'd spent together. I could still picture her, sitting on the floor eating pizza, not giving a shit how many carbs were in the slice. That was a real girl.

Not to mention the girl had a fantastic taste in music. Sure, she'd put down Eminem, but he couldn't hold that against her after she'd introduced him to her "absolute favorite song" the past weekend. He had never heard of the band before, but he liked what he'd heard, and now added a slew of their songs to his iPod.

_Take this broken heart and make it right…_

_I feel like I've lost everything when you're gone._

_Left remembering what it's like to have you here with me,_

_I thought you should know…you're not making this easy._

I wondered if there was a deep meaning to her favorite song as there was to mine. There had to be; people don't pick random favorite songs that they couldn't relate to.

"All right, you're ready to go," the balding man said to me, clapping his hand on my shoulder.

"Thanks," I mumbled, still unhappy that I had to walk around like a fucking Frankenstein. I had to go on a date with Vanessa looking like a complete moron.

Okay, so it wasn't exactly a date. She'd invited Hennigan, too. Whatever. But he had said he was going out for the night with some of the guys, which meant I didn't have to compete for her attention. At least if anything developed between us, I already knew I wanted it to be something real. John, on the other hand, was still hurting over the whole Melina/Dave Batista situation. She had called him recently, apologizing again, but he claimed to be over her. And when John meant he was "over" her, he usually meant that he had a new girl "under" him…

I didn't want the next girl to be Vanessa. I fear that's who he's got his sights set on, though, especially after Alicia Fox clearly turned down the offer in front of most the locker room. Of course, that didn't hurt John's ego; he met a pretty blonde at the club the next night and left her alone in her hotel room in the early hours of the morning.

Before I headed back to my own locker room to get ready for the better half of my night, I ran into Natalie Niedhart and her boyfriend, TJ. She always had an exhilarating amount of energy, and TJ never seemed to match it. He was actually really, really dull.

"Philllll!" she said, a huge grin plastered across her face.

I greeted her, unsure of why she was really talking to me. She was nice and all, but she never really acknowledged me much before.

"Rumor has it you've got a date," she said, the big smile still on her face.

"I do, yeah."

"Well have fun, but don't hog her all to yourself tonight, if you know what I mean. I invited her to come out and play," a mischievous grin replacing her bright and shiny smile.

Hearing that made me nervous. I never went out, ever, because I was really afraid that it'd become a downward spiral for me. I couldn't keep her with me to make sure people like Orton didn't try to become bedmates with her…and he certainly would.

Maybe I'm being stupid. She's not my girlfriend, we're only barely getting to know each other. Yet here I am, jealous that other guys will have the opportunity to charm her.

Maybe I'm not even her type. She didn't really seem to give off the vibe of further interest.

Although Natalie was still chatting with me, quite a one-sided conversation, I excused myself quickly, and she nodded knowingly. I had somewhere I had to be.

I quickly switched to my street clothes, glad to be comfortable again. Let me tell you, trunks are not fun. Their main purpose is to squeeze everything in, and if you get 'em too tight, your balls are sore for the next week. Get 'em too loose, though, and your fan base will see your asscrack on national television.

Quickly slinging my duffel bag over my shoulder, I walked towards the exit.

There she was, texting away furiously, waiting for me. Her eyes were focused on her cell phone, but when she looked up for a moment and caught my eye, she put it away in her back pocket. God, she was so beautiful. Looking into her eyes made my heart skip beats.

I sound so homo.

"How are you doing?" she asked timidly, her hand immediately flying over her mouth when she saw my stitched lip.

"It's not as bad as it looks," I said quickly, but I didn't think she bought it.

"What happened, exactly?"

"Accidentally bit through my lip. It's my fault, really…" I didn't want her to obsess over my lame injury, so I opened the door to the parking lot, letting her walk out first. Her straight black hair blew in the wind, reminding me of Pocahontas. I laughed to myself.

"What?" she asked nervously, which I found funny as well. I was surprised to see her nerves so jumpy; she was usually so chill.

"You remind me of Pocahontas," I said breezily.

"I'm part Mexican," she said bluntly. I felt more at ease, seeing her relax into herself.

"I know. I think it's the hair."

I zipped up my sweatshirt, but the breeze made Vanessa shiver. Naturally, I offered it to her.

"I'll be fine once we get into the car," she insisted, but I wouldn't hear it.

Finally finding my black SUV, I opened the door for her. But she stood there, a confused expression painted across her features.

"Are we meeting John there?" she asked. Clearly, she had forgotten that she'd even invited him. Which, silly as it was, made me want to do a victory dance. It was apparent, then, that she didn't hold interest in him. If she did, she would've been disappointed not to see him right away.

"I guess he's got his own thing going on tonight. Knowing him, that means he's going to look pretty and go out with some of the guys."

"O-kayyy," she drawled, and I think I sensed a little bit of hesitation in her voice. Maybe she _was _disappointed that he wasn't coming.

Maybe he still had competition after all.

* * *

_**Sneak Peek:**_ _"We could always go back to your hotel room," he suggested, slurring his words a little. "And nobody needs to know."_

_Vanessa wished she had the power to say no. She didn't want to ruin anything. But nobody would know, right? And when she had a little more than some alcohol in her, she wanted action. Besides, she hadn't had any since she'd quit…_

_She slid a key card over, quirking an eyebrow. For a split second, she felt guilty. She didn't want to have meaningless sex anymore. That was part of her reasoning to quit the business. But this she was doing for herself, and she wanted him bad._


	11. A Sorta Date

**0Disclaimer: It is not a secret that I don't own WWE or any affiliation with it, characters, events, or sponsors mentioned in this story. **

**A/N: The next few chapters are going to be where the rating comes in. Trust me, I'm pregnant and hormones are flying…so it's nice to write them out of my system. That being said, I would love some more reviews, just to see how you guys actually like the story. Don't be shy! **

"Are you sure you're okay?" Vanessa asked, her eyes concentrated on Phil's lip. He didn't take his own eyes off the road, and she worried for a split second that she was annoying him.

"I'm fine, really. I should know better."

"Yeah, well, so should Mike."

"I heard you two got into it. The entire locker room knew about it in under ten minutes."

Vanessa's face flushed. _And that's exactly why I don't want them to know the truth. Everyone would know my business in under ten minutes._

"I know," she said, heat rising up in her. "I could've fucked up, big-time. But I didn't. Well, not really."

"No, you didn't. At least the creative team liked what they saw. You have friends in high places, and I'm thinking that helped you out tonight. But really, you should've just let me sit in the middle of the ring and bleed."

Vanessa cringed at the thought, then tried to lighten the mood a little.

"Should've…could've…would've…" she sing-songed, mocking him playfully.

"Alright, I get it," he said, and Vanessa lightly punched him in the shoulder.

"I feel bad that John didn't come along. I don't want him to think that I don't like him or anything."

Phil finally looked back towards her. "Trust me, he doesn't think that. The guy thinks he's God's gift. It would definitely surprise him a little if someone turned him down. And, it has." He added the last part knowingly.

"He's not exactly my type. He's a pretty boy," she laughed little. She was still having a weird mix of emotions; she was really looking forward to spending time with Phil one-on-one, yet John would've been able to save the conversation from the awkwardness that followed.

Once they'd finally arrived, they were seated by a pretty young hostess, who seemed to oggle Phil all the way to their table. They sat across from each other, and Vanessa could, once again, feel her heart pounding through her chest.

_This is so stupid. Why am I nervous? I shouldn't be. Then again…I've never felt real feelings before._

They both ordered, and another silence followed as the waitress took away their menus. Vanessa bit her lip nervously, hoping that Phil had something to say, but Stephanie's words of wisdom popped into her head.

"_Women like us can't stand around and wait for a man to come…"_

"So, tell me something about yourself," her own voice surprised her as she mimicked the first conversation she'd had with Bryan. She took a sip of her water, waiting for a response.

"Well, my name's Phil. I'm a WWE Superstar…"

Vanessa rolled her eyes. "Seriously, come on," she urged, sounding a little whiney. She had to admit, she had no idea how to act around a guy that could be a potential boyfriend. In the past, her job came in the way of having real feelings for anyone. And before that, all of her ex-boyfriends had pursued her.

"Fine, fine," he surrendered. "Let's see…music is my entire life."

"I thought the WWE was?"

"Well, it's a close second. Both significantly changed my life for the better. Now, your turn."

She thought for a moment. "Well, it depends, do you want to know a random fact, or do you want to know something that gives insight into who I really am?" she hoped he'd pick the latter; it would give her some idea of whatever it was that he was feeling.

"Whichever you prefer."

"Alright. Well, I don't like getting close to anyone."

"A deep dark fear?"

"I guess. It really prevents me from getting to know people, though."

"Not everyone you meet is going to hurt you."

"Sure, but why take the chance?"

"You might miss out on something. Do you have a reason why you've built this wall up? A broken heart, maybe?"

Vanessa laughed. "Hardly. Relationships never came first, though. It was always focusing on what I wanted to do with my life, then later I could find someone who wanted the same things that I did. But I really think I've gotten this way because I feel that if people really knew me, they would treat me differently. I just want to start over."

"I'd like to get to know the real you." 

"Maybe in time, you will. We've made it this far," she winked, then felt like a total dork. "What about you?" she quickly asked, pretending to erase that stupid wink from her mind forever.

"What about me?"

"Your philosophy on letting people get close to you."

"Well, John and I have been good friends for a really long time. Since we first got into wrestling together. We've been through a lot. Females, of course, are an entirely different story."

"Oh?" Vanessa asked curiously. Maybe he had enough baggage that would match hers, and then she wouldn't feel so guilty once he knew the truth. She pretended not to be overly interested, though, by folding her napkin as small as it could possibly go.

"They all seem to have a hidden agenda. Like, for example, my first girlfriend since I'd joined the WWE ended in a storm. I came home early once to surprise her, and found her in bed with her manager. Yet, she still managed to blame my absence for her misdeed."

"I'm over it now," he told her, not missing a beat.

Their food arrived, and now, after a little history lesson, Vanessa felt worse than ever. Phil didn't deserve to get his heart broken again, and she was now certain that he would, if he knew. She didn't deserve him. She deserved to be miserable. Her past would eat him alive, just like it did to her.

"I—" she was cut off by the tinkering of her cell phone, indicating a text message. She apologized, extremely embarrassed that she'd forgotten to turn it off or at least on silent.

"Don't worry about it," Phil said between mouthfuls.

She quickly read the text. Naturally, it wasn't a number that she recognized. The way it was written, though, was a great indicator of the sender.

_**Girl, where are you? Come find us at the Element club on the corner of 9**__**th**__** and Monroe!"**_

"Ah, crap," Vanessa breathed. She'd forgotten about her promise to Natalie to go out.

"What's wrong?" Phil asked, finishing the last few bites of his meal.

"Nat. She invited me out tonight. I completely forgot about it."

"That's alright. Vanessa, you're more than welcome to go and unwind. After all, you had a really stressful night. Have some fun with your friends."

"Come with me. Please." Her eyes plead.

"Sorry, V. I really limit myself to nightclubs. I don't want to fall into old bad habits."

"Habits?"  
"Straight edge. No drugs, no alcohol. It almost ruined my life once."

Vanessa officially felt like a dumbass. She really should've pulled up the guy's Wikipedia page, at the very least.

_Probably means he's against meaningless sex, too. And being the person I used to be, that rules me out. He could probably forgive it a handful of times, but making a career out of it and letting the world see what you look like naked probably isn't exactly cool with him._

"I can skip it. We could go see a movie instead," she offered, almost hopeful that he would agree to it.

"As much as I enjoy your company, I don't want to keep you from trying to get to know other people, too. They might like you personality just as much as I do." He gave her a toothy smile, which was a tell-tale sign that he hadn't forgotten their conversation earlier in the dinner.

"What if you'd be doing me a favor?"

"In that case, I still respectfully decline. Don't be afraid of everyone, I promise not everyone's out to get you."

Vanessa sighed again, making a big deal of going out. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad.

"Watch out for the weirdoes, though," he said seriously.

"Too late, I'm sitting across from one," she said bluntly, still a little disappointed that he wasn't going to at least come along.

"Nah, the real ones. The ones who slip shit into drinks and stuff. Excuse the language."

"I know. I'll be really careful. At least I'll be with Nat, and I'm sure she's got my back. She's got some guns on her, she'll take down anyone who tries that."

"She definitely does."

After he paid the bill (which she heavily objected to, yet to no avail), he took her towards the club.

"I'll drop off your duffel and stuff at your hotel room in the morning," he said to her. "Did you remember to pick up your key card?"

"Yeah, luckily I checked in before the show. I don't know if I'll want to go through with that process so late in the night."

"Well, you call me if you need me to come get you or anything, alright?"

"Sure," she said. She handed him her phone when he pulled in front of the club. He punched his number into it, handing it back to her.

"Have fun. Let loose," he said, leaning over to give her a hug.

She said goodbye, and he drove off. She looked at the line, instantly feeling over-dressed. Actually, she felt too dressed in general; most the women wore miniskirts and halters; getting as close to naked as was possible. She was confident, nonetheless; she didn't have the glittery eyeshadow or anything that would give off the wrong idea about her. Instead, she was a little more polished; her favorite jeans and favorite boots complimenting a snug black button-up, hinting at some cleavage.

"Vanesssssssa!" someone called to her, and it was exactly who she'd guessed.

_Wonderful. Let the fun begin._


	12. He Always Gets What He Wants

**Disclaimer: It is not a secret that I don't own WWE or any affiliation with it, characters, events, or sponsors mentioned in this story. **

**A/N: WARNING: And starting now, you'll understand why this is rated M. Next chapter is already written, and I greatly apologize, but I'm 7 months pregnant and my hormones are flying, haha. That being said, I would love some more reviews, just to see how you guys actually like the story. Don't be shy! **

Vanessa turned, and Nattie was waving at her, her other hand looped in a really pretty girl's arm.

"This is Brie," she said, jerking her thumb towards her friend. Brie reminded Vanessa a little bit of herself. It was weird how much they resembled each other; though Vanessa had more of a natural tan, real hair (no extensions, here!) and darker eyes.

"Hey," she said, with a small wave.

"Hi!" she said back, quite obviously inebriated.

"I told Phil not to keep you forever," Natalie said, a little alcohol on her breath. "He lied! He said he wouldn't!" she looped her other arm through Vanessa's, guiding her towards the herds of people and towards the bar.

_Weird. So Phil knew I was supposed to go out. Yet he conveniently forgot…and of course is too nice to ask me to stay with him. Too bad I don't deserve a good guy like him…_

Finally, Natalie's destination was reached, and an older man with a fuzzy goatee greeted them.

"Found a friend?" he asked. His voice didn't match his appearance; he looked a lot crankier than he was.

"Vanessa here needs a drink. She just joined us."

"She needs to get her drink onnnn!" Brie giggled.

"I could just have a soda," Vanessa offered, but both the other women put that thought to sleep quickly.

"I'm thinking she wants an oatmeal cookie," Brie said, then shook her head, as if confirming herself. "Yes, she does! And, so do I!"

With some quick hand motions, liquor bottles flew all over, yet none touched the ground. Vanessa was extremely impressed; clearly, the bartender was experienced.

Vanessa watched as he completed the shot with a dash of Everclear, and her stomach lurched a little. When he slid the glass towards the ladies, though, she took the shot quickly. It tasted fantastic; literally like an oatmeal cookie.

Brie had a big smile on her face as she slid her empty shot glass across the bar. She threw some cash down, then said to the bartender, "and that should cover both!"

Vanessa felt like the bartender was watching him, and, as Natalie ordered herself another drink, she turned to Brie, and they started talking again.

"I think I know you," the bartender said finally.

Vanessa laughed. "I'm not from around here," she said, waving him off.

"No, no. I guess not know you…but I've seen some of your videos. Fucking sexy," he said, licking his lips.

"Um…I'm thinking you've got the wrong girl," she started to turn away.

"I don't think so. I ain't seen anyone else be able to do that thing you do in _Roamin' Roman._"

Vanessa froze. "I'm sorry, I really don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh, I see what's going on here. You shouldn't be ashamed. Makes a lot of men hot for ya…"

"Vanessa, are you coming?" Natalie had her eyebrow arched, as if to say, _what the fuck are you doing?_

"Sorry, I gotta get going," she said. "Thanks for the drink, though…"

She got up from her barstool as fast as possible, eager to join the the other women in the center of the dance floor.

Randy sat at his own round table in the far corner, a few empty bottles scattered. His buddy Cena was on his left, Barrett on his right. It was a weird combination of friends to anyone else, yet they all understood each other. They understood him, rather. Not many of the wrestlers did.

"She's quite the firecracker, I hear," John was the first to speak in a long while.

Randy's attention snapped to him, and, sure as shit, he was eyeing up that new chick, who was dancing in the center of the floor with whichever of the Bella twins. _Brie, probably,_ he thought. _Nikki didn't hold her alcohol nearly as well; by now, she was probably passed out in some mid-card's bed._ He evilly grinned to himself, remembering the night which that particular detail allowed him to hook up with both the girls just hours apart.

"Not that I've ever talked to her. She'd get me into a hell of a lot of trouble with the girl," John continued. He was absolutely the most doting fiancé within the company, telling any Diva who tried to bed him exactly what his thoughts were about Elizabeth. He was completely in love with her, and that's what it was. He wanted nobody else. Randy was slightly jealous of his self-control.

"I've seen her…somewhere," Randy grumbled, still watching her. "I just can't place from where."

"Maybe a strip club?" Barrett offered, but he knew immediately that that couldn't be right. She dressed too nicely; always very put together. In his experience, strippers _always_ showed as much skin as they could get away with.

"No matter," Randy said, smacking his hand on the table. "I'm gonna get some of that pussy."

"She's really not your type," Wade countered. "She isn't afraid to say what's what. She's good at telling me off, at least."

"Yeah, well, I like the challenge. Besides, 'hot girl' is my type, and she fits that completely. I wouldn't mind bending that over my bed."

"Looks like that's what Hennigan is thinking, too," John spoke up. Sure enough, much to Randy's dismay, John Hennigan had approached the dark-haired woman. He seemed to be offering her a drink.

Randy watched as she smiled, took a huge gulp, then grabbed on to the muscular man's bicep. She forced him to start dancing with her, his hips awkwardly moving along with hers. She pulled him closer, closing the gap between them entirely.

_What I wouldn't give to be Hennigan right now. She knows exactly what she's doing…and it makes me want her even more. Even harder…_

"May as well be fucking on the dance floor, huh?" John said, his face too cheerful for Randy's liking.

Randy shot his friend a look, clearly pissed that fucking Hennigan beat him to the kill. He made a silent vow, promising that it wouldn't deter him. He could only imagine how good that little body would feel. Under him, on top…in front of him. He didn't care, all he wanted was to show her who was boss within the locker room. He wanted her. And, as everyone knew, what the Viper wanted, the Viper fucking got.


	13. A Product of Alochol

**Disclaimer: It is not a secret that I don't own WWE or any affiliation with it, characters, events, or sponsors mentioned in this story. **

**A/N: WARNING: This chapter is a heavy M rating. Please, if you don't want to get full on-graphic detail, then just pretend this chapter doesn't exist. **

"You're a great dancer. Good with your hips," John leaned close to Vanessa, his breath hot on her neck. Shivers were sent throughout her entire body. He had leaded her to a small bar table, drinks for both of them within reach.

"Dancing's not all these hips can do," she purred, succumbing to the effects of the alcohol she'd been handed throughout the night.

"Oh, really. Care to tell?" John was still close to her, this time, his eyes were on her lips, as though he wanted to start kissing her wildly. Almost as if everyone else wasn't even there.

"It's more of a 'showing' kind of thing," she replied to him huskily. She pulled his head a little lower, gently biting on the side of his neck. He let out a near silent moan, so that only she could hear the damage she'd done. Vanessa could feel him against her thigh, which only turned her on more. She was in control, and she knew exactly what he wanted.

"We could go somewhere," she whispered, her mouth suggestively close to his. God, she was so horny; she wanted nothing more than for this guy to play a little, then let her ride him. She knew exactly the rhythm she liked; after all, she'd had practice. And she was certainly feeling a little selfish tonight…

"Well, Phil and I share a room, and he'll be there…" John trailed off, watching her reaction.

_Phil. Shit._

Vanessa had forgotten about him in her current state. Forgotten the entire date, how much she wanted to pursue an actual relationship with him in the future. Sleeping with his best friend and showing him how to fuck like a porn star probably wasn't the best approach to that…

_Porn star. And once he knows the entire truth, he'll know that I'm not who he thought I was. _

John must've seen the thoughtful look in her eyes, and he knowingly jumped into a short monologue.

"We could always go back to your hotel room," he suggested, slurring his words a little. "And nobody needs to know."

Vanessa wished she had the power to say no. She didn't want to ruin anything. But nobody would know, right? And when she had a little more than some alcohol in her, she wanted action. Besides, she hadn't had any sex since she'd quit…

She slid a key card over, quirking an eyebrow. For a split second, she felt guilty. She didn't want to have meaningless sex anymore. That was part of her reasoning to quit the business. But this she was doing for herself, and she wanted him bad.

He took her by the hand, leading her out of the crowd. She quickly (and drunkenly) texted Nat, telling her she was getting tired but found a ride back to the hotel. As unfortunate as she felt before, having an odd number of Superstars and Divas ended up working to benefit her.

Vanessa was a little tipsy, the alcohol doing most the talking as they huddled close together in the back of the taxi. The anticipation was killing her, and all she wanted was to fast-forward the drive back. She kept picturing the Shaman of Sexy completely naked; his chest muscles were already a tease to her. She wanted to see all of his muscles, up close and personal.

Finally, they made it back to the hotel. They stumbled in the lobby, hoping not to bump into any night-owls who might suspect something was going on between them.

After finding her room, she tried hard not to giggle, feeling extremely naughty. She slid the key card, revealing a gigantic bed in the center of the room. John clicked on the small lamp near the bed, illuminating the room just enough so they didn't trip over anything.

She looked at him with a burning fire in her eyes, consumed with lust. She was definitely going to hell for this.

He turned to face her, then let his body collide with hers, pulling her little waist in for a hot, sloppy kiss. She loved the feeling of his warm tongue on hers, and could only imagine what else it could do…

It felt so good to be in control of her lust. It wasn't forced, and she wasn't surrounded by a hundred people telling her which camera to look at. She felt a little guilty; she knew this was a casual hook-up. No strings attached. Surely, he felt the same way.

John let his lips wander down her neck, unbuttoning her cute little blouse. Falling to the floor, he pushed off her tank top, revealing a sexy black lace bra.

With another quick movement, that, too, hit the floor. She moaned as his tongue played tricks on her nipple. She began to pull off his tight, black t-shirt, a growing anxiety to reveal his sexy abs.

Finally, Vanessa and John stood face to face, both wearing their jeans, which were begging to be taken off as well.

She looked at him, signaling she wanted him, and he took entire control. He held on to her shoulder, pushing her down onto the bed. He kissed her bare skin, teasing her, and her body was screaming for more. His trail of kisses got lower and lower, and finally, began to unbutton her jeans.

Vanessa felt herself get warm between her thighs. He was going about this expertly, like he could read her mind.

John slipped a few fingers underneath her jeans, also managing to get hold of her black thong's side strings. He slowly inched both articles of clothing down, letting himself take in her little body.

He threw both the jeans and panties aside, wetting his thumb and taking it to her little nub. He rubbed it gently, causing her to moan, then slowly slid his middle finger into her moist flesh. She threw her head back, arching her body slightly, ecstasy controlling her. He lowered his head, keeping his eyes on her, enjoying the pleasure she was in. His tongue began rolling in circles, synchronized with the magic his fingers were doing.

Vanessa looked down over her chest, looking into his hungry eyes. It was so sexy seeing him at work, clearly hungry for more of her taste. She began to squirm, holding on to his dark hair and lightly pushing him further into her. His tongue darted inside, wriggling and licking the depths of her. Her body began to tense. He nipped her lightly, then, and continued to let his tongue dart in and out of her.

She moaned loudly, her orgasm washing over her. She weaved her fingers in his hair, trying not to hurt him, and tried letting her body slow down. John, however, didn't stop pleasuring her, and that sent her body into orgasmic convulsions.

She finally couldn't take the pleasure anymore, and needed him inside her—_really_ inside her—right away. She managed to free herself, a confused John still low on the bed. She carefully pulled him up towards her, then flipped him onto his back. She ripped off his jeans, and she couldn't wait to just fuck him.

"I don't have anything," he told her, his eyes apologetic.

"I'm well-protected. I promise," she assured, yanking off his boxers next. That was completely true; she chose the IUD when the business' manager had signed a contract stating that there had to be some form of birth control used, whether it be barrier, pill, or patch. Just as long as the method was medically approved.

She wrapped her hand around him, sliding her fingers up and down the warm appendage. She began to position herself over him, her skin tingling with each inch she pushed into herself. He slid in fairly easily, the traces of her orgasm still keeping her warm and moist.

"Mmmm that feels so good," she leaned back, thrusting her hips forward and throwing her long black hair over her shoulders.

She began to rock her hips, his body mashing against hers.

"Fuck me, V," he said, pulling her slender waist further into him, his full length now inside.

She moaned again in response, completely turned on by his demand. She liked a vocal guy. She bounced herself against him some more, letting his hands roam all over her naked body. Every time she came back down, he pulled her deep, letting her slam into him each time their hips met.

She bent her head towards him, grazing his lips, then hungrily kissed him while continuing to press herself into him.

"Fuck," John breathed, taking hold of her hair. She felt her muscles tighten, and his followed suit.

His jaw began to clench, and his body pumped, preparing for orgasm. Pulsating perfectly against her, an orgasm of her own triggering.

As the last waves calmed, Vanessa rolled off from his sweaty, muscular body. His muscles were highlighted with beads of sweat, and even still, Vanessa found him incredibly sexy.

Her own body hot and sticky, Vanessa lay back against the plush pillows, still completely naked. Her body felt like wiggly gelatin, making a snap decision not to move at all for a shower tonight. No, that would be a morning task.

She admired John as he pulled on his clothes, and she was really glad that there was a clear, mutual, understanding between the two; he didn't try to cuddle or spend the night. No, it was just a mind-blowing fuck for both of them.

She felt her eyes begin to get heavy, and her eyelids started to close.

"Thank you," she mumbled, and she felt John squeeze her inner thigh before letting himself out the door. She pulled a sheet over her naked body, the coolness feeling good against her skin.

Thoughts of Phil danced in her head as she began to drift off to sleep.

_How fucked up is that?_ Was the last thought she had before finally giving into the overwhelming tiredness.


	14. Aftermath

**Disclaimer: It is not a secret that I don't own WWE or any affiliation with it, characters, events, or sponsors mentioned in this story. **

**A/N: Please excuse the failure to update. I just had my son and am currently sitting in my class updating for you guys (cause this is boring, haha).**

The pounding in her head was the first thing Vanessa noticed the next morning.

_Ugh, what the fuck was I thinking?_

She rolled over to check her cell phone, only to find it thrown onto the floor. She had a few random text messages from Nat, but nothing of dire importance.

It was then that she realized that not only was her head pounding, but her door was, too. She drew her covers closer to her naked body, wary of whoever might be on the other side. She half expected someone to jump out at her and say they'd videotaped all of the night's events. That wouldn't surprise her any. Whatever makes a person a few bucks…

"Yeah?" she called out, her voice still a little sore from having just woken up.

"Vanessa? It's me. I brought your luggage and things for you…"

Vanessa leaped out of bed, the cold air hitting her body immediately. She ran to the bathroom and grabbed the robe, tying it close to her body.

She opened the door, and Phil stood there with a grin on his face.

"Well, good morning, sunshine."

Vanessa gave a weak smile. "Why didn't you come later, instead of waking the dead?" she joked, playfully pushing on his shoulder.

Phil chuckled. "V, it's almost noon. Must've been a rough night last night, eh?"

_Shit. Fuck. He knew. He knew!_

"Well, you know, it seems that any night with the Bella twins and Nattie is going to be a rough night…." She bullshitted him a little, then her thoughts jumped to what she probably looked like. She could only imagine the post-sex hair that she surely had.

"It was for everyone. John didn't come back until really late. Can't imagine why that might be…"

_FUCK! There goes any chance…out the window. What was I thinking?_

"I didn't really see him much," she lied through her teeth, and wanted to kick herself for it. If Phil knew the truth, she was screwed and he'd peg her for a liar anyways.

"Yeah, you probably didn't. He sets his sights on a random for the night, and he's happy. Anyway…I'm glad you had a good time. I was wondering if you wanted to get some coffee or maybe a light lunch before heading out to Arizona?"

Vanessa gave him a warm smile. "Of course. Just give me about…say, half hour to get beautiful."

"You probably need a little more time…" Phil joked, a cocky grin on his face.

"You're such a jerk," she said, sticking her tongue out at him. "I'll see you in half an hour!"

After closing the door, she let out a sigh of relief. No, Phil didn't yet know the truth. Thank God. And if John hadn't said anything, then he probably wouldn't. So long as she didn't piss him off for any reason.

She wheeled her luggage in her room, going through everything until she found exactly what she wanted. Maybe she'd have to go shopping soon…her clothes were getting boring.

But first, a shower….

* * *

"I saw her leaving with that douchebag last night," Wade murmured under his breath. "Hennigan."

Randy looked at his acquaintance, following his gaze to the Green Mountain Coffee stand in the hotel lobby. The two men were awaiting John, and the three of them had some signings to go to later. There she was again, getting some coffee from the barista. With…Punk?

"She really makes her rounds," Wade added, shaking his head. "You really should have no problem bedding her."

Randy nodded, watching her little hips in her tight little jeans…god, she looked so hot even when she wasn't trying. He thought the way she looked last night was sexy, but she pulled off looking great in normal, everyday clothes.

"Gentleman," John Cena sat across from the two, taking up a huge leather chair. "What am I missing?"

"Just talking about your little firecracker," Wade laughed. John seemed to make the connection automatically, then looked at the girl his friends were interested in.

"Mine? Nah, I'm good."

"I'm still pretty pissed that she turned down the offer to join the Nexus. Who does that?"

"She does. Probably fucking Mizanin, too," Randy growled. "I'm sure that's not all."

"My guys keep saying she looks so familiar, man. Everyone says so, but nobody can quite figure it out. I intend to."

"So do I. She knows she's hot. Pisses me off, she shows interest in every damn mid-card but none towards me. Or any of us."

"Randy, I really want to bring down this bitch a few notches. Especially after turning down such a great offer…"

Randy nodded. "But how?"

John shook his head. "You guys are crazy. She clearly has interest in that guy…leave it be."

Randy and Wade both shot angry glares towards the third man.

"Yeah, Punk and everyone else. You saw her get cozy with Hennigan last night. No doubt in my mind something happened there."

"We gotta do some heavy research on her. Randy, you're still tight with Hunter, right?"

"Yeah, we talk. Why?"

Wade scoffed. "You ask him to do some digging with the wifey. This is crucial. Until then…I think we should fuck with her a little bit."

Randy liked where this was going. Fucking with women was his specialty. He just needed to get her alone…


	15. Lose Control

**Disclaimer: It is not a secret that I don't own WWE or any affiliation with it, characters, events, or sponsors mentioned in this story. Except, of course, Vanessa. **

**A/N: WARNING: Please excuse the failure to update. I just had my son and am currently am sitting in my class updating for you guys (cause this is boring, haha).**

_God, she was so beautiful. _

And he couldn't stop thinking about her. He wanted to be around her all the time. She was, without a doubt, someone he could really see himself with. Trying to date any other Diva would be a joke. Vanessa was real. A half an hour it took her to get ready that morning, and she wore simple jeans and an old sweatshirt. Her "jungle princess" hair, as she'd called it earlier, was back in a loose ponytail. She hadn't bothered to put in contacts, so she wore her dark-framed glasses instead.

_But she never looked better. And I just want to be with her. There was chemistry between us at our dinner date…and I asked John this morning if she'd shown any interest in other guys while out last night. _

John had shrugged, and said he'd barely seen her, but the few times he had, she was either dancing or at the bar, turning away a sleazy bartender. None of the guys had really approached her: "She's just so intimidating," he had said.

"So what sort of exciting life did you lead last night?" Vanessa asked him, taking a sip of her coffee. They'd found a comfy little nook with a few chairs, out of sight of almost everyone on the roster who had been down in the lobby area.

"Me? I came back here, shot some pool with a few guys I met, and fell asleep watching _Pawn Stars._"

He knew it sounded really boring and dorky compared to her night, surely, but it was true. And he didn't want her to think he had a hidden agenda with her, only wanting to mess with her. He was sure that at least half the guys on the roster, even some with girlfriends, held an interest in her. In fact, he _knew_ that they did; fucking Wade Barrett couldn't keep his beady little eyes off from her. But as far as he could tell, and as Bryan had told him earlier, she had no interest in anyone.

"Oh my god, I love that show!" she said, a huge smile creeping up on her face. "I know, it's totally nerdy. I love that kind of thing, having something really cool and not knowing what it's worth. I also really like _American Pickers._"

Phil was elated. He couldn't believe how he'd stumbled into this girl. Especially now, while he was starting to lose hope for an actual relationship. And even more especially, one within the company.

He kept falling. Harder and harder, every day. All he could do was hope she was feeling the same way.

* * *

"Hunter? It's Randy."

"Hey man, how's it going? How's your girl?"

"She's…doing good. I haven't seen her much lately. But that's expected. But listen…"

"How about the separation?" he cut off the other man.

"Almost finalized the divorce," Randy grumbled, hating to admit it. Yet, at the same time, it gave him freedom again. He thought he was ready to settle down, but now he looked forward to the life of a bachelor again. It was too much fun to let go of.

"Sorry to hear that. Now, what were you going to say?"

"Man, there's this new girl here. She's really hot. Smokin'. Barely has to try—"

"Randy, it's too soon—"

"You still haven't learned to listen well, have you? Poor Steph. But she's all great and stuff, gets along with most everyone, and everyone seems to love her. But everyone also says she looks so familiar. She's pretty tight-lipped about her past—any idea what the story is?"

There was silence on the other end. "Are you saying that girl that chums with Miz?"

"Yes! Her. Do you know anything?"

"Hmm…No, I really can't say that I do. I'll go ahead and do some poking for you, but it might be in her contract that nothing can be publicly released about her."

_Damn. And if that's true, the McMahon's are making a point to keep the secret, too. He could hope, of course…_

Vanessa was headed back to her room, gathering the rest of her things up before check-out. Phil had to promote something something, she couldn't remember what it was. She considered taking a nap, but she knew the flight to Texas was going to be a pretty long one. She had four hours to kill…what to do, what to do…

As she started to slide her key card through the door, she was startled by a tall figure headed out of his own room.

"Why, if it isn't lovely little Vanessa," he growled, his eyes glaring into her.

"Barrett."

"Why so hostile? We can still have a partnership. You can still join the Nexus. You're more than welcome to, really."

"And get to see your fugly mug every Monday night on top of random occasions like this? Thanks, but I'll pass."

Wade stepped closer to her, closing her in.

"It doesn't have to be this way. Really. What do you see in guys like Hennigan or Punk? What's wrong with…say…me?"

Vanessa was certain that her face showed surprise. That was confirmed quickly when Wade smiled to himself and nodded, his eyes locked on hers.

"Yeah, that's right, love. I noticed you and Henny last night. I noticed you with Punk this morning. Those guys are good friends. Fucking with both of them in a 24 hour span? You must be good."

"I don't know what you're talking about, fucker," she said, gritting her teeth.

"Oh, but you do. And listen. I could easily mention something to either one of them."

"You wouldn't."

"You don't know me very well, then, do you?"

Vanessa frowned. "What the fuck am I supposed to do, then?"

"Well, I am sure the way you've got Stephanie wrapped around your finger, pulling a few strings to switch your storyline to the Nexus won't be too hard."

"I can't do that! They already have a plan…with Mike, and Phil…"

"They do? Or you do? Sure, it might take a month to play with, but let's get real, Vanessa. You're not going anywhere with Mike on Raw. Join us, and maybe you will. I could even train you a little in-ring. Maybe in-bed, too…"

"Fuck you," she spat, jabbing him in his chest with her pointer finger. "You think I'm some cheap slut? Think again, asshole."

"Vanessa, you'll do this if you know what's good for you. And, if you want to save your relationship with Phil. Clearly you're interested. So why would you come back to your room with Henny?"

Vanessa's eyes narrowed. "I didn't do shit."

"Right, well, Heath Slater sure disagrees. "

_Are you kidding me! Now I have to make it look like like I'm only looking out for my own career. But I have to do this. I can't ruin chances with Phil when after this morning, we were hitting it off well again. Manipulative piece of shit!_

"Fine," she growled, flicking her bangs out of her eyes. She got close to him, enough to smell his aftershave, and put on her best pissed-off face. "You're a fucking asshole, and I still hate you. No matter what faction we're in together, you and your little boy toys are pieces of shit."

"Well, love, wouldn't have it any other way. And you're nothing but a little slut, now aren't you?"

Vanessa fought the urge to punch him in the face. She pushed open her door, clearly very pissed off.

"At least I can get laid, Barrett. You'd need two paper bags for the courtesy of your partner—an extra in case the first gets a hole in it."

With that, she slammed her door shut , crumpling immediately on her bed.

_How could anyone see us? Was I really that trashed to not realize a red-headed douche creeping around the corner?_

_

* * *

_

_Ha! Something HAD happened with Hennigan last night. I didn't expect that she'd have such loose lips as soon as I dropped a random name in there. Heath Slater wasn't even in this wing of the hotel. But now, she can join the Nexus. And we'll keep an eye on her. And by God, I can't wait to turn Randy loose on her. She'll fuck herself over. _

Wade smiled to himself, proud of his work.


	16. Here's to the Past

**Disclaimer: It is not a secret that I don't own WWE or any affiliation with it, characters, events, or sponsors mentioned in this story. Except, of course, Vanessa.**

**A/N: WARNING: Please excuse the failure to update. I just had my son and am currently am sitting in my class updating for you guys (cause this is boring, haha).**

Vanessa played what she'd remembered of the night over and over in her head, trying to remember any figures off in the distance who could have been Heath Slater. She was actually more than positive that she'd notice the obnoxious red hair, but then again, she did have alcohol in her.

Then, she wanted to kick herself. Enjoyable as John was, and the intensity he brought to the bedroom, she just couldn't believe she'd let out her animalistic side. Hadn't she promised herself after leaving the company that the next time she'd have sex and make it meaningful? But, on the other hand, she'd never been able to fully enjoy it, either. While it was expected that life as a "porn star" was exciting, it was extremely looked down on. Especially with potential relationships. And, in a sense, she hated herself for exploiting herself that way.

It wasn't meant to be a career. She wasn't meant to be pretty well-known within the company. People knew who she was. Hell, John had recognized her tattoo…but couldn't recall from where. Nobody could recall where they knew her from. She liked it that way, but at the same time, she wondered if people would recognize her if she was naked, sucking on some dick.

Maybe sex was all she was good for after all. Maybe the career had changed her completely, so she was unable to maintain a relationship.

_No. I know how I feel about Phil. I haven't felt this way about anyone since…_

Since Allen. Her high school sweetheart. Track star. Beautiful, curly dark hair and hazel eyes. Chipped tooth. Gorgeous smile.

She tried to stop herself from thinking about Allen. All the memories were extremely painful. She'd only had one relationship after him, with another guys he'd met on set, but it was really hard to stay in a relationship with a porn star when you never really knew what they were doing with whom from day to day. She knew it never meant anything but people get jealous, and she was very jealous.

Her thoughts flooded back to Allen, and she pictured the night in her car. She was dropping him off, it was the first year she'd gone to college for her Associate Degree. They were barely hanging by a thread at that point.

**_Flashback:_**

"I really need to tell you what's going on, before you find out any other way," she had said to him.

Allen's eyes drooped, and she knew he expected the worst. As he should have been.

"I've been offered a more permanent job within the company. They want to hire me on for at least 5 more films. I think I'm going to do it, babe, I gotta make money for school."

Allen's eyes flashed up at her, this time, full of rage.

"It's not about money for school, you stupid slut. Do you think I'm retarded? You have always been interested in more than one guy. It's never been just me. You like male attention. That's never going to change."

Vanessa's jaw dropped.

"Is that really what you think of me?" she said, her voice dry and weak.

"It is now. I didn't really like the idea in the first place. I trusted you. I trusted it would be a one-time thing. Just because you're beautiful doesn't mean you should fuck everything with two legs and a dick."

By now, she had tears in her eyes.

"We can just break up. Then it'd be no trouble for you."

"Exactly what I was thinking, Vanessa. I'd rather be with a woman than a slut. Ever hear 'can't change a hoe into a housewife?' Well, that's the truth, and that's how it is. I don't want you."

**_End flashback_**

She and Allen had gone separate ways. She didn't really know much about him since, besides that he was engaged to an old friend of hers from high school. It used to eat at her every day. It took her years to let go of the hurt. Let go of him. While she knew she had no feelings for him anymore, she still harbored his words; a hoe. A slut.

She shouldn't have been surprised, either, a week after that or so he'd gone to get his physical for his university's college track team, and he called her in an angry rage, screaming at her some more, on about how he'd contracted chlamydia from her.

Of course it was from her. She didn't know who had what on set.

All she wanted to do was forget. Yet it tore her apart every day.

And now, she'd started feeling something amazing. Phil treated her the way she longed to be treated, and she hadn't been so comfortable in a really, really long time. Was Allen right? Was more than one man's attention simply not enough?

She was driving herself crazy. Finally, she picked up her cell, and speed-dialed Nattie.

"Hey girl! How are you!" she chirped on the other end happily. Too happily, as always.

"Fucking terrible. I need to get out of here and let my brain stop thinking so much," Vanessa replied bluntly.

"Well, I can help there, girl! I'll meet you downstairs in ten minutes; we'll do some shopping and grab some dinner."

"Yes. Maybe that'll be good for me. I am going crazy already, and I haven't been on board for long. I'll see you soon."

"No problem, Vanessa. It'll be fun!"

_Thank God. When feeling shitty, it's time to go shopping._

That was the only good part of feeling down.


	17. Twisted

**Disclaimer: It is not a secret that I don't own WWE or any affiliation with it, characters, events, or sponsors mentioned in this story. Except, of course, Vanessa. **

**A/N: Happy Monday! And so, to get over the Monday blues…an update. Unfortunately a filler chapter, but I'm trying hard to link everything together here.**

"Alright, Vanessa. What's the occasion?" Natalie had asked, for the first time, she was completely serious.

They were walking together through the mall, looking at nothing in particular yet hoping to spend some cash. This was not usually Vanessa's idea of fun, but unfortunately, when she was feeling low, going shopping gave her a high.

"I've just been thinking a lot about where things have gone wrong with my ex," she admitted, and couldn't believe that she did. Why would she say anything? She mentally kicked herself. Nobody needed to know about her twisted story.

"Girl, don't even think about it. Look where you are now. When's the last you've heard of him? Unless he's like, Charlie Sheen, he's probably a loser."

Vanessa considered this. "You're right," she said finally. "I guess just, well, it's not a secret that I have definite feelings for Phil. I don't want my future with him to be ruined by my past with Allen."

She mentally kicked herself again. _Now I'm using first names? Fuck's wrong with me?_

Natalie gave a whole-hearted smile towards her friend. "I knew there was something going on, Vanessa! And I couldn't approve more. You don't want to fall for someone like Orton or Barrett…I'm thinking Phil's a good guy. That's exactly what you need. If you were hurt that badly, finding someone that will build you back up is necessary. There's no point in feeling heartbroken forever."

Vanessa almost felt like a weight was lifted from her shoulders. She knew Natalie was right, and she couldn't believe that she'd doubted her. In fact, a couple weeks ago she'd thought she was just…annoying.

"Look, V. Before TJ, I had a man, too. Engaged to him. Blah blah blah. He cheated on me with my best friend. Took me quite a long time to realize that there was nothing wrong with me. In fact, I see now that both of them used me. That's what people do; use other people as stepping stones simply because they can. But you grow from it and you learn from it. And you move the fuck on."

"I guess you're right. I never did anything wrong in my relationship with him. And I thought I was over it completely but trying to be with someone after all that hurt is just awful. Fuck it, here's to right now."

Mid-stride, she held up an invisible glass. Nat caught on, and they toasted to right now.

"Now, let's get you something that'll blow Phil's mind," Natalie giggled. "After all, we just got paid."

* * *

"Hey, Barrett. It's me, Dave. I overheard a very interesting conversation between Natalie and Vanessa."

"Alright, lay it on me."

"The girl—Vanessa—is definitely into Phil. Worried about it though because of an ex."

Wade coughed on the other end of the phone. "Dave, I don't see how this is relevant."

Dave smirked at no one. "Don't you see, man? That ex is probably more than happy to expose her for what she is. We need to find this Allen fellow."

* * *

Randy Orton had just gotten the news. Hurting Vanessa became his main focus. He should feel bad. He should care. He'd been used, too, after all.

But he didn't feel bad and he certainly did not care.

But how would he go about finding Allen? They didn't have a last name to go off from. Hunter was remaining tight-lipped after their last conversation. Yes, he'd found out what the secret was. Stephanie had told him he couldn't talk about it at all or she would personally revoke his contract to return to the ring.

That, of course, only made it more interesting. He almost felt like he was feeding off from the drama, but at the same time, _nobody _picked a mid-card over Randy Orton. Even this bitch.

He figured though, that it was about time to start laying it on her. If everything worked out right, he'd bend her little body in ways she never thought she could. Then he'd reveal her truth with the help of Barrett. Maybe they were both assholes for it. Neither cared much; this girl was nothing to them.

It was time to start showing any interest in her. He was certain she wouldn't go out tonight. So how…how would he do it?

_I'm Randy fucking Orton. I'll figure out something._

And then, he did.

* * *

Vanessa returned to her hotel room that evening to a post-it note on the door.

_Let's hang out tonight. –P_

She had a huge smile on her face from there on out. As predicted, shopping was an instant mood-booster. She felt better about herself and her choices thanks to her new-found best friend. Nat knew what she was talking about, that was for sure.

And now, she had a few brand-new outfits to choose from to hang out with Phil. Including the boots that were similar to those she'd worn her first night here. She did, after all, promise herself she'd buy some with her first paycheck.

With a quick text to Phil, they confirmed the plans to go down to play pool.

_**Are you sure? There's a bar nearby and I know you don't want any problems. -V**_

_**I'm sure. That doesn't bother me, it's the free-flowing drugs at clubs that do. –P**_

So she took her hair out of the messy ponytail that it had been in all day and finally put in her contacts. Makeup was on. Now it was just a matter of deciding what to wear. It felt so nice to try dressing to impressing one person. She was elated that she was finally getting her life back. She was no longer the sex goddess; she was Vanessa, who would go forward in life and stop looking back.

She never gave any thought to those who were looking back for her.


	18. Jumping Ship

**Disclaimer: It is not a secret that I don't own WWE or any affiliation with it, characters, events, or sponsors mentioned in this story. Except, of course, Vanessa. **

**A/N: Thank you sooo much for the reviews of this story. I cannot thank you enough, and I love getting feedback. Don't be shy, and keep up the reviews. I had this written awhile ago, but unfortunately FF had my stories goofed. So I emailed them, and now I can get back at them :)**

* * *

Monday Night Raw came and bit Vanessa in the ass. Naturally, Wade had brought up to Stephanie that they would like to include her in the Nexus to help further her career

"We can see the attention she's getting. Having a heel like her would be absolutely perfect, she'd be a great addition to our faction," he'd stated his case.

Stephanie reluctantly agreed, but Vince was all-in. He didn't feel that Vanessa was put out there enough, and he wanted more personality from her. The Miz was not quite the push she needed anymore.

She felt really shitty, but Mike said he understood completely. "Take opportunities while you can, Vanessa. I know you're not my biggest fan but I know you were made for this, despite what's going on with anyone in the locker room…"

The scripts had been slightly revised. The Miz would be in a feud with CM Punk for trying to take away his girl. By the end of the month, Vanessa would dump both of them on their asses and reveal that she had a new love—the Nexus.

The clip that night was easily perfected. How could she pretend she was infatuated with Phil when, in fact, she really was?

"Hey, you. I know you got a little roughed up. How are you feeling?" she asked, puffing out her chest and looking at Phil's character sensually.

"You know, Vanessa, I'm feeling….much better now," he gave his trademark toothy smile, and Vanessa melted inside. He walked away, and the camera focused on her face, which showed a far-away, distant look.

During Punk's match with Miz later that night, he stopped right before he did the GTS, pointed at Vanessa, and winked.

It was clear now to the WWE Universe that something interesting was going on between the two.

* * *

"Vanessa, wait up," a heavy accent called after her.

"What is it, Barrett? I have places to be…" she rolled her eyes, not wanting to deal with his bullshit today.

"I'd like to talk about our arrangement," he said. "If you have a minute."

Vanessa spun around to face the asshole. Her eyes flashed. "Our arrangement is that you fucked me over. You fucked Mike over. Because you hear shit and you think it's okay to use that against me!"

"Vanessa, how else would I get one of the most wanted ladies to join the Nexus? You hate my guts; I'm aware of that. But we can help can train you to fight. And you can help us."

"Help you how? Because I'm not interested in sleeping with all of you for some kind of gang initiation, if that's what you're going on about."

"Oh darling, you don't need to worry. Gorgeous as you are, I don't know what kind of diseases Henny has."

Vanessa's jaw dropped. The next thing she knew, her fist connected with the side of Wade's face, slamming into his jawline. Her knuckles stung from the impact. She felt white-hot with seething anger.

"Fuck. You."

"No thanks, love," Wade chuckled, rubbing his face. "By the way, you hit like a girl."

Vanessa wanted to beat the shit out of the fucker. What a condescending prick!

"Next time, you won't be so lucky then," she gritted her teeth.

"We must really learn to get along, Vanessa. We're business partners. We can be friends, you know."

"I'd rather chew on broken glass," she responded.

* * *

_Fuck,_ Wade thought to himself. _I won't be able to figure out Alan's last name if we aren't friends. So who can we trust to find that information out for us?_

He dialed Randy's number on his cell, leaving him a message. He was probably already at the hotel, down at the bar.

"Orton, listen. I tried hard to get on the bitch's good side. It isn't going to happen. She's ridiculous. We need to somehow get her friends to get this information for us. I have a suggestion. She'll never know what happened. I can't believe I didn't think of this before."

The next number he dialed was Justin Gabriel's. He was a good-looking guy. He would probably get the information they were looking for.

"What's up, Wade? I just saw you ten minutes ago."

"Listen. You know how Vanessa will be involved in the Nexus?"

"Yeah, I know. I don't get it, personally. I don't understand why we're fucking with her at all."

"Because, she's a dumb little bitch that thinks she runs the company! Now, if you want to keep your job, I suggest you do what I'm about to tell you to do."

He heard Justin take a gulp on the other end. "You got it, Barrett."

* * *

Sneak Peak:

"_Well, I'm really interested. I'm kind of the reason Wade asked her into the Nexus. She doesn't know it yet. But I mean, she keeps bringing up this guy, Alan…is that her boyfriend?" _

"_Ex," Natalie replied. "I know you're interested but she kind of already is spoken for…"_

"_But only kind of. So there's Alan guy…who is he?"_

"_He's not who you have to worry about."_

"_No, but I feel like I know him. Alan Parker, right?"_

"_No…Alan Stansen. You must be a little confused."_


	19. Past is Passed

**A/N: Well, I've been on a ridiculously long hiatus. I don't know why I stopped writing, because I love writing, and this story is actually pretty decent. Keep reading, readers!**

I was no stranger to the fact that Vanessa despised the power that the Nexus members had. So, why would she ever let herself get talked into it? Something didn't add up.

_Unless…someone forced her._

But no, she was a very smart and opinionated girl. She wouldn't ever stand for that. It might have done something with the brawl between her and Mike after she broke character. Their chemistry wasn't the same anymore.

Phil gave himself a small smile. _At least our chemistry seems to be good._

The he mentally kicked himself for sounding like a douchebag.

Watching Vanessa play pool the other night, he had realized that she was the realest person he'd ever met. She was beautiful, sure, but she was relaxed. She carried herself well. Yet, he knew she was somehow trying to hide something from the world. Her eyes even showed it; a cloudy mask to what could be immense happiness; a fear that always loomed around her—why else was she fearful of getting too close? He understood, he didn't like the world knowing that he'd nearly ruined his life due to drugs. But, it came with the fame, and the best thing you can do is face your demons, get up in their face, and walk away from them. It takes time for a person to be able to let go of whatever they are holding on to, so eventually, she'd be ready to.

_And whatever it is, I swear I will still think she's the most amazing woman I've ever met._

Vanessa woke up with a jolt.

That dream again. She hadn't had it since Alan left.

_Alan is the past…and I put him there again yesterday. Where he belongs!_

It was usually the same. They were sitting in the car, her tears streaming down her face. Him wordless, waiting for her to disappear. A strong memory.

But this time, it was different. This time, she said to him, "You're making a mistake."

"If he can't see you for what you really are, he is."

It was the weirdest thing. She had to tell Phil the truth…she knew that he deserved to know before she got in any further. Before…anything. She had to stop dreaming about this craziness. The only way she could was to tell the truth.

She checked the crappy little alarm clock next to the hotel bed. 7:54 A.M. Yuck. Still, she pulled out a little can of Red Bull, clicked it open, and took a swig.

She texted Phil quickly.

**Want to do something today? –V**

Then, she'd tell him the truth. She had to.

* * *

_God damn it. I hate doing whatever the fuck this douche tells me to. I can't wait to break out and be a better superstar than him. Why in the fuck are we worried about that girl's life? Veronica? Whatever. _

There she was, in the lobby heading to the sauna. Without her boy toy. Thank god.

"Hey, do you have a minute?" he found himself asking. Natalie didn't hide her surprise.

"What in the world could you ever want from me? To talk me into jumping on your Nexus train? Whatever you guys have on V, fine, but it's really cowardly of you to do."

"Actually…I kind of pulled the strings on that one."

Natalie huffed. "You? The master behind the operation?" I don't know about that."

"I just needed to have a reason to get to know her better. There's a lot of things that I do like about her. I need to get to know her better…but…"

Natalie cut him off. "Look, dude. I don't really know what I can do for you, but I can guarantee, you shouldn't be messing with her."

"We've been talking a lot, though. I can kind of feel some kind of spark…"

Natalie rolled her eyes.

"Well, I'm really interested. I'm kind of the reason Wade asked her into the Nexus. She doesn't know it yet. But I mean, she keeps bringing up this guy, Alan…is that her boyfriend?"

"Ex," Natalie replied. "I know you're interested but she kind of already is spoken for…"

"But only kind of. So this Alan guy…who is he?"

"He's not who you have to worry about."

"No, but I feel like I know him. Alan Parker, right?"

"No…Alan Stansen. You must be a little confused."

She turned from him, clearly stating the conversation to be over.

_Thank the fucking high heavens. He had never seen Natalie be such a bitch before._

But, he knew that his own girlfriend's closest friends were extremely protective, too. He smiled at the thought of Emily. He had to call her, check on her and how their little boy or girl was coming along. Man, he couldn't wait to be a dad. Almost as much as he couldn't wait to break free of the Wade Barrett storyline. Be himself. He despised Barrett.

He called Emily, but she didn't answer.

"Hey, Em, it's Justin. I miss you. I love you. Call me back."

* * *

He watched her leave her hotel room. Her hair fell in waves. He wondered what it smelled like.

She didn't see him, but he saw her. Saw the rips in her jeans, the Miami U sweatshirt. Saw her walk down the hall, her hips sashaying slightly. She barely even had to get dressed, and she was still fucking sexy.

Fuck, what he'd give to take those clothes off. He knew he would. In time. And even though so far she had no interest in him, he knew she'd let him fuck her. Once he told her he knew everything, she would let him take her lacy little thong off with his fucking teeth. She'd spread her legs, let him hit it, and he'd get up and leave. Yeah, that sounded good. She'd fuck him whenever he pleased, then, just so he kept his mouth shut.

_Isn't it funny, the past that a slut chooses is the same one that's going to fuck the future up? Sluts can't fall in love. Especially not with decent people. Sluts fell in love with people who can use them, abuse them, fuck them every which way, and treat them like shit._

He'd been in love once. He was a bad person before that. He didn't deserve to be happy, so why should this bitch? The past always follows you, wherever you go.

* * *

_Preview:_

"_After Alan, I really didn't have any more relationships. He really did damage.."_

"_Did he cheat?"_

"_No. We just didn't see eye to eye on my career choice."_

"_If he couldn't support you, then there's a reason you didn't work out."_

_"I can't really blame him. I really have to tell you something."  
_


	20. Mr Stansen

**A/N: I love you guys, so here, have a chapter. **** This one is going to be a HOLY SHIT chapter, so I'm sooo excited to be writing it!**

Vanessa knocked at Phil's door.

She was greeted by a chest, and it wasn't Phil.

"Well, good morning, beautiful," John said, smiling down at her. She peeked up at him through her eyelashes.

"The other half will be back in a bit," John said. "He ran to get some Mac fac."

"Um…what?" Vanessa asked.

"Big Mac Factory. McDonald's breakfast. Just cause we have muscles doesn't mean we don't like terrible food!"

Vanessa ignored him, pushing past him and sitting down on the couch. She slid off her flip flops and drew her knees up to her chest. She pulled her iPod out of her sweatshirt pocket and flipped it on.

"Vanessa?" John said before she'd put the earphones in.

She looked back towards him.

"I know something's going on between you and Phil. I promised I wouldn't tell anyone what we did, and I haven't. I just...well, I don't want to see you hurt him. He's really been fucked over in the past."

"I know. You don't have to worry about it." She suddenly felt uncomfortable.

"I never got to tell you how much I enjoyed our night together."

"I did, too, John. Really." She meant it, but she knew that just like the rest of them, that sex was meaningless. She wished it meant something. She wondered what it would be like to have sex with someone that wasn't just a fuck.

"I do respect that you're pursuing my best friend. I'd love to be with you myself, but I understand. Just please, don't hurt him."

Vanessa put her earphones back to her ears. What to listen to? She really needed something mellow. Curling up on the couch, she turned on Taylor Swift. It was dorky and she knew it, but some of those songs were the epitome of her life. This song reminded her of Alan.

_Some day, I'll be living in a big 'ol city;_

_And all you're ever gonna be is mean._

_Some day, I'll be big enough so you can't hit me,_

_And all you're ever gonna be is mean._

_Why do you gotta be so mean?_

* * *

"Vanessa? Wake up."

Vanessa stirred, Phil standing over her, running his hand through her hair. She smiled weakly.

"Sleepy?" He smiled back down.

"I was fine. It's this fantastic couch. I even had a Red Bull this morning."

He snorted.

"I picked up some food," he said, handing her a coffee with a big golden 'M' on it.

She grabbed it, her hands warmed instantly. "I haven't had one of those hashbrowns in a really long time," she smirked.

"You're in luck," he said, handing her over a small bag.

"Where'd John go?"

"Dine and dash. He has a promo downtown."

"I wonder what it's like to have promos."

Phil smiled again. "It's nothing special. Depending on what it's for. His is for the Special Olympics, but when it's for autographs and stuff, it's a lot of people, screaming your name. It's not always easy."

There was a long pause.

"So, John and I had a conversation about you," she teased.

"Let me guess, the old 'please don't hurt him'" thing."

"Exactly the same."

"He's seen me through it all. I know he means well. Don't let him scare you."

"No, I know. You're lucky to have someone watching out for you."

"Kind of. Everyone knows what happened with Ashley, and Amy…and it sucks. You're lucky to not have anyone know about your past."

She gulped.

"About that…"

"I know we kind of talked about it. No other guys after…?"

Vanessa shook her head.

"After Alan, I really didn't have any more relationships. He really did damage.."

"Did he cheat?"

"No. We just didn't see eye to eye on my career choice."

"If he couldn't support you, then there's a reason you didn't work out."

"I can't really blame him. I really have to tell you something."

With that, Phil leaned in, completely surprising her. He kissed her gently, like he was afraid to break her. His hand stroked her cheek gently.

Butterflies probably leaped out of Vanessa's mouth.

He ended, slowly pulling back, his eyes looking up and at her shyly.

"I have to tell you something, too. I know you've been hurt. I've been hurt too. I've done some shitty things in my life. I'm sure you have too. Whatever it is you keep held inside, I promise you I won't see you any different, Vanessa. The way I feel for you is the most I've ever felt for anyone in my entire life. I swear, no other woman could hold a candle to you… I really like you. Or something."

"Or something?"

"Or something."

"Phil…"

"I love you, Vanessa."

* * *

"Alan Stansen's office, this is Brittany. How may I help you?"

"Yes, my name is Wade Barrett. I have an upcoming appointment with Mr. Stansen."

"Sure, Mr. Barrett. He's been expecting your call. I'll send you through to him."

The phone rang a few times, and a gruff voice answered.

"Stansen."

"Good afternoon, sir. This is Wade, calling about our lunch meeting today."

"Ah, yes. Writing an expose on the slut, I recall?"

"That's correct."

"Does noon work for you, Wade? I have to be in court at two, but otherwise I would be more than happy to meet with you."

"Yes, that sounds just fine."

"Great. I'll meet you at Prima Vista around noon."

He hung up, and Wade smiled to himself.

This was going to be great.

* * *

The restaurant was busy. Wade came in and acknowledged the hostess. "Party for Stansen?" he asked dully.

"Sure," the blonde chirped, reminding him of the bimbo that gave Justin Gabriel the very last name he needed.

He saw the man in the corner booth, on his laptop. He was certainly intimidating, probably an excellent lawyer. He had dark hair, darker eyes, and excellently trimmed facial hair. Actually, he looked quite similar to Dave Batista.

Wade introduced himself, and shook his hand. They made slight small talk. Yes, he was writing a story on this woman who just made it big into wrestling—but why? Alan didn't follow WWE, so he knew nothing of her overnight success. It helped him, too, because he didn't recognize the Nexus leader.

"Vanessa. Oh, the bullshit we went through. We met one summer through her friend, Shay. She's my wife now." He reminisced.

"What was your relationship like?"

"Usually, it was really great. We went to opposite schools, though, and it wasn't fun hearing that she was talking to so and so and flirting with this guy…it was hard to trust her, really."

"Why's that?"

"Well, she was smokin' hot back then, too. But she can't ever just settle for one man's attention. She wants everyone to know she's hot. That's why she chose what she did, and it wasn't me."

"So how were things between the two of you sexually, if you don't mind me asking?"

"I was her first. She never knew that she wasn't mine. I went away for winter break to Colorado one year and met a girl there. She was cute. That's about it, though. Vanessa never knew I'd cheated, and she never would've guessed it, either."

"Did she ever cheat on you?"

Alan laughed merrily.

"Did you do any prior research on the girl?" he asked, cheeks rosy with amusement.

"She really keeps herself private," Wade said, trying to hide his annoyance.

"Did she cheat on me…the girl is a fucking porn star!"

_HOLY SHIT. Yes, it all made sense now. That's why people recognized her from somewhere. That's why she has a fucking job at WWE! She has close ties with Chyna Doll and Mr. McMahon…holy fuck._

"The best part is," Alan continued, "she could've done so much more than fuck on camera. She has a degree to be a dental assistant. That's what the whole thing was for. Money for school. But she got sucked into that world of fake, glamorous sluts."

"I loved Vanessa very much. Truly, I did, when she was right for me. Besides from her sucking other guys off, though, our relationship was a mess. She walked in on me and Shay at our apartment," he laughed. "But the dumb girl never broke up with me. She just cried a lot. And expected that nothing more was going on. Ha! But every time she had class late at night, guess who was fucking me?"

He had a smile on his face. "Why should I stand back and watch her mess with guys for the world to see? Her sex was just sex. With them, and even with me. We just weren't meant for forever."

"So why do you still hate her so much?" Wade asked. He was beginning to wonder if this guy was just super jealous.

"I don't hate her. Whatever she wants to do with her life isn't my business anymore. But it was then, and I believe that we could have been more if she wasn't so selfish."

"If you could tell her one thing in the world today, what would it be?"

"That she never gave me chlamydia. I wanted to throw that in her face to make her feel absolutely disgusting. But she didn't, she thought she was so fucking special because guys ogled her. She didn't care if she was a walking STD. She wanted to have sex. With whoever."

The men finished up, and departed.

Outside, Justin Gabriel met him.

"You got that all on tape?" Wade asked.

"Sure did. He never even saw me with the recorder right behind him…but listen. This shit is really deep, and it's not really our business. I don't know if we should be doing this."

"Just listen," he snapped at the smaller man, "This has to happen. People shouldn't just be granted the right to WWE. People work really hard to get into the business, and never make it. She sucks the right dicks, and she's the right person for the job? Now, I need you and Slater to scour the internet for her videos."

Justin pressed his mouth shut. He handed Wade the recording without a word.

"Now we just need Randy to do his part. We'll make this the best video the locker room has ever seen."


	21. Loose Lips Sink Ships

**A/N: Well, upon re-reading my story, I realized how ridiculous my editing was prior. So maybe I'll go back. I did change Allen's name to Alan, just because it's more traditional. Sorry for failing. ANYWAYS, don't stop reviewing, reading, and letting me know how to keep going! Here's another holy sh*t chapter for you lovelies!**

* * *

That afternoon was a whirlwind. All colors seemed to swirl together, and there was no stopping time.

Had he really said those words? Yes, he had. But she couldn't say them back. Not yet. She was afraid that they would regret those feelings after the truth came out.

For the first time in her life since Alan, she felt connected to someone.

"_Vanessa,"_ Phil had mumbled, between small kisses on her lips.

She stopped, looking soulfully at him, her wavy hair now a jungle princess mess. He took his hand and pulled her hair back from her face, a small smile on his lips.

"If we don't call it quits now, I'm not sure I'll be able to at all," he said, not missing a beat.

"I'm not sure…if I want to," Vanessa admitted.

Phil kissed her again, gently brushing his lips against hers. He took her hand in his and kissed that, too.

"Believe me, I don't want to. But I don't want to make the mistake of jumping when I don't know if it's rocks or water waiting for me."

"I understand," Vanessa said, trying hard to mask her hurt. _Did he really just turn her down?_

"You're beautiful in every way. Don't ever change that," he said, pulling her closer, wrapping his broad shoulders around her.

They launched into another deep conversation, Phil learning more about dental school (but not how it was paid for) and her family life; and she learning more about life on the road and how he stopped using. The more she talked with him, the more at ease she'd felt. She realized she was opening up to this man, and she was okay with that.

* * *

"Fuck!" John Morrisson said, taking another blow to his face. There were three sets of feet, but he never saw who they belonged to. He was just coming in from his promo, headed the back way through the hotel to avoid fans and the media. Someone...rather, a few someones, were waiting for him.

"Tell me again, you piece of shit," said the gruffest voice of them; "What did you do with that Mexican cum dumpster?"

"Nothing!" John said again, tasting the salty iron pouring from his nose to his mouth. He made a promise, he'd never tell.

"You're a fucking liar!"

Another blow to the back of the head.

"Don't underestimate us," another voice chimed in.

"I took care of her! She was too drunk to do anything, I swear!"

"Try again, bubs." A kick to the ribcage.

John made a silent prayer. _Please. Someone find me._

"How much did you pay her?"

"I didn't pay her!"

"So she sucked your dick for free?"

"It wasn't like that," John started choking on his blood, unable to put his hands up to control the bleeding.

"We'll stop, once you start telling the truth."

_Fuck. I'm so sorry, Vanessa. I'm not going to die like this._

"Fine. We were both too drunk and we slept together. It meant nothing and nobody was ever supposed to know about it."

"Does her current dick she's fucking know that his best friend slept with his girl?"

"No…they were only starting to…talk…at the time…." John could feel himself going.

"How was she?"

"She…is beautiful. And despite what we did, a good person."

The group laughed.

And everything faded to black.

* * *

"We've been talking for three hours," Vanessa said sleepily, checking the time on her phone.

"I know, but time just flew by," Phil said. "Although, you look like you could use another nap."

"Maybe," Vanessa said, her eyes suddenly feeling really heavy again.

He helped her up on to his bed, snuggling close to her, letting her put her head on his chest.

She pulled out her earphones again, giving him one to listen to while she listened to the other.

_Sometimes I stare at you while you are sleeping,  
I listen to your breathing,  
Amazed how I somehow managed to,  
Sweep you off of your feet girl,  
Your perfect little feet girl,  
I took for granted what you do,  
But I'll do better.  
I know, baby I can do better._

Soon, the two were fast asleep, and neither one of them could hear their cell phones chiming, the caller urgently trying to get hold of them.


	22. Knocking

**A/N: Okay, so I know it's been forever. I did have this chapter typed, but that stupid paperclip thing came up and ruined my life. But anyways, I know it's overdue, here's a re-write…and thank you to everyone who stood by me through all the dark days.**

* * *

Knocking. Knocking. Vanessa's head was knocking.

Slowly opening her eyes, she smiled a little at Phil's quiet snore. She was surprised that she could hear him at all, with her head knocking so loudly.

Then it registered: her head wasn't the problem. Someone was trying to break down her door.

She sprang up to unlatch the hotel room's door. Simultaneously, Phil had woken up, stretched, and started to drag himself out of bed.

"Baby V, what the hell?" Daniel Bryan looked completely disheveled.

"Nap time," she replied groggily but simply.

"Not anymore. We've got a problem."

Phil appeared in the doorway, putting his arm across Vanessa on the frame, almost protectively. But if this move intimidated her friend, he certainly didn't show it. Instead, he brushed his arm off from the frame, and walked right on in, shaking his head. He was clearly pretty upset.

"We've all been trying to get hold of you…Nat's called you probably a thousand times…."

"Okay, okay! What's going on?" Vanessa asked, her heart starting to flutter.

"John. He's in the hospital."

Phil suddenly stood tall. "What happened?"

Daniel shook his head. "I don't really know. He's not doing well….he was beat up pretty badly. But whoever did it was really smart and made sure the security cameras were blocked off. I tried to find something, anything…but there isn't anything. We have no idea who put John in that hospital bed."

Vanessa's heart was beginning to shatter with each word. She knew people had it out for her. But this was something different. Who would hurt John?

"Hopefully when he wakes up, he'll remember anything—anything—useful. But for now, you two should probably get ready. We're going to see him."

Daniel pardoned himself to get some coffee while Phil and Vanessa gathered themselves together.

"Who would do something like this?" Vanessa wondered out loud, her voice shaking.

Phil stood, speechlessly, throwing a few things into a sack. The way he was acting made Vanessa a little nervous. He seemed shaken, certainly. But maybe a little bit vulnerable.

Trying to help, she hugged him from behind..

"I know this is hard. But I love you, and we can get through this together. Things are definitely going to be okay," she half-whispered, beginning to get choked up. Her head was suddenly swimming with memories of her past. She found herself recalling her childhood bedroom, Alan holding her closely and whispering the same words after she found out her abuelo passed away.

_This is different,_ she reminded herself, coming back to reality. She also coaxed the memory of Alan to disappear. That no-good, dirty, selfish…ugh.

Phil turned, his eyes misty. "I know. I really don't understand it, I just can't lose John. Maybe not literally, but if he's gone from the business, I worry about myself. He's helped me so much. And as cliché as it sounds, the guy's like my brother."

Vanessa forced a smile. "If I've learned anything about John, it's that he's stubborn. He won't let some asscrack hurt him like that and walk away."

With that, she grabbed Phil's hand in her own, and pulled him out the door.

* * *

_Mr. Barrett,_

_After you asked for more details about Vanessa, I've searched the deepest corners of my memories. I'd like to share a few downfalls of our relationship, despite the fact, of course, that she was in the movie-making business._

_She was always about school. I'd met her one summer in high school and fell in love with her immediately. Shay, her friend (and my wife, as I'd mentioned during lunch) was extremely jealous of the instant attraction we'd had for each other. She was fun, beautiful, smart, and she knew what she wanted in her life. But she messed up on how to get where she wanted to be._

_The summer was great. The first kiss on the hammock in her backyard, right down to the first time on our camping trip in the little green tent. High school love, that's all it was. But it deteriorated quickly, first with her senior year and then even faster when she'd gone to do her dental thing._

_I remember all the fights and arguing. I remember her telling me I "had to deal" with the fact that she would be sleeping with other men. That this was a side project, and that without it, she would be able to pay off school. _

_This is where I started to care less about who and what she was doing. I started worrying about me. Which is where Shay came in. _

_Yes, she found us in the apartment. She read the text messages. She knew all about my secret relationship._

"_I can't leave you, Al," she'd sobbed. "You're the only one for me."_

_I felt bad for this pitiful girl, but really? If that were true, wouldn't she give up on the porn industry? She didn't, of course, and made more films, some earning those golden dick award or whatever that is. She was grotesquely proud of one that she'd earned. Congratulations, whore, you've got an award for taking an ass-ramming._

_I knew stringing her along wasn't the right thing to do, but at the same time, I liked having her fawn over me. Not to mention, people were always commenting on how beautiful our kids would be. It was a safety net, almost. But eventually, I just knew the net had to be snipped…._

"_I will never find anyone else who would accept this lifestyle," she told me once. I know she was embarrassed. How can you not be? How many dirty dicks can you stick in yourself before you're 25? _

_My point is, she is mystifying. So much, in fact, that I doubt her current flame, if she has one, has any idea of the double life she's lead for so long. If he does, power to him, but I know I couldn't bury my feeling of betrayal. That's just too much baggage for a real relationship. And because of her own terrible, disgusting choices, she was right. Nobody else will accept that lifestyle._

_I hope this helps put together some pieces. Let me know if you have any more questions._

_Sincerely,_

_Alan Stanten_

_Attorney of Criminal Law: Herring and Stanten Law Practices, LLC._


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